Gentle Christian Mothers Community

Gentle Christian Mothers Community (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/index.php)
-   Nurturing our Children (AP & Multi-age Parenting Topics) *Public* (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/forumdisplay.php?f=416)
-   -   Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement) (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/showthread.php?t=443721)

Aisling 03-20-2012 12:46 PM

Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Hey There Little Mama,

I saw you beating yourself up today, frowning at the mirror and wondering what on earth others must think of you.

I caught you looking with despair over your house strewn with crayon bits, stray shoes, toys and books. I watched you grind your teeth and breathe deeply in effort to not yell as your preschooler ignored your clear and patient instructions and whizzed through the house laughing that maniacal, nervous "will you come and make me?!!" laugh. I saw your panic when you realized everyone is out of underpants and that, once again, the laundry piled up beyond what you could possibly fix in a day.

I saw the unflushed toilets, the pail of dirty diapers, the flies all over the place because your 2nd grader chronically leaves the door open. I saw the kitchen floor you haven't mopped for weeks. I'll be kind enough to not describe what YOU looked like today.

I heard your 5yo use an interesting word with grandma on the phone. I saw your toddler wipe her bum on the shower curtain. I saw your preschooler lick that bug. I saw you hit the snooze button another time while your children eat corn flakes, of all the things!

I saw your 3yo take a bite out of 3 different kinds of vegetables in the grocery store before you noticed her leaning over and helping herself, and saw the store manager scowl even as you bagged up the forbidden fruit.

I saw you raise your voice as your child absentmindedly and systematically made an enormous mess in the floor for no particular reason. I saw her lip quiver in remorse and apologize and set to cleaning, and watched your shoulders slump with regret over your own sharpness.

Things, by all appearances, have really gone to pot. You appear to have let yourself go. It's all a bit of a mess.

And do you know what? I'm so very proud of you right now. Even more than when everyone's in clean, adorable outfits, more than when your children chose kindness in public, everyone is in an age of equilibrium, more than when you turn heads on the sidewalk, more than when life is easy.

Why? Because I'm smart enough to know that when everything's this rough, you're working your absolute hardest.

I know that you've been up all night relieving a gassy tiny belly, when you'd much rather be sleeping soundly on your own pillow.

I recognize that the mess around you represents busy hands that are exploring the world in the safety of your home, even though you'd prefer it be clean.

I can tell by the kindness in your eyes that you raising your voice is a big deal, that you'll apologize for it, and that you've been modeling remarkable patience and maturity all day long (and that you'll do it all again tomorrow).

I'm glad for you that your children feel safe enough to express their big feelings, and am glad that they are safe enough to be re-directed in a gentle way.

I see that you're rocking and nursing and bonding with that precious little baby in your lap, and that the love you're steeping them in now will warm the fire of their heart for the rest of their lives, even though it's exhausting in the moment for you. :heart

I see your heart torn in so many directions, trying hard to prioritize, constantly checking to make sure every person is honored and heard in your home. It's no small job you're doing, and I see that. :heart

I see you folding underwear for the child still having accidents, taking stains out of shirts of little girls old enough to care, carefully instilling competence and skill in your olders while your body nurtures your youngers. I saw you change no less than 20 diapers in one day. You're learning to juggle, even though it looks like you've done nothing at all today.

You're my HERO. You're their hero. Even if they don't recognize it now, someday, they will. And the kindness that you instill and extend to their hungry hearts and bodies and mouths now won't fly into the void and return to you empty. Love begets love.

You are beautiful. I am proud of you. You are doing a wonderful job, and honoring what your heart is calling you to do, and you're doing it in a way that only you can. I admire you, appreciate you and respect you. :hugs Thank you for caring and loving the future generation with such valor and tenderness and wisdom.

Keep your chin up, little mama bird. :heart This is the hard part. All days won't always be like today; some will be harder and some will be infinitely easier. All will be full of love, because YOU are full of love. :heart You bring that to your home, and the universe honors you for it.

Love,

yourself. :heart

houseforjoy 03-20-2012 12:50 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
I'm printing this:heart:heart

racheepoo 03-20-2012 12:52 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
That was simply one of the most smashing things I've ever read. :heart

Calee 03-20-2012 12:52 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Made me cry-I'm SO there. So there. Thank you.

Victorious 03-20-2012 12:54 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:bawlmyeyesout. I'm saving this forever

Niki 03-20-2012 12:54 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
I'm crying now. :happytears I so needed to read this today. Thank you:heart

JJsMom 03-20-2012 12:55 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears
Have you been spying on me?

Sparrow 03-20-2012 12:56 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Crying too!

This needs to be a legendary sticky :heart :heart :heart :heart :heart

backtobasicsmum 03-20-2012 12:57 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears:heart I think you should put this on facebook so we can share it there too.

Atarah 03-20-2012 12:57 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:ty

mamaeffie 03-20-2012 12:59 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
thank you. so much. :heart

3boysforme 03-20-2012 01:01 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
I :heart you. Thanks for posting this. :hug

Marzipan 03-20-2012 01:08 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears

charla 03-20-2012 01:10 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:heart

jewelmcjem 03-20-2012 01:11 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
I'd love for you to put that in a FB note, to be shared...

Autumn 03-20-2012 01:11 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears :heart:heart:heart

Thankfulforgrace 03-20-2012 01:13 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Beautiful!! (although even on a good day I never achieve that all together good family look :giggle. I need someone to come and make us over :roll)

AngelaVA 03-20-2012 02:04 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:cry :heart

J3K 03-20-2012 02:05 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
subbing , I have no time to read this now....

Housekat 03-20-2012 02:22 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears

TraceMama 03-20-2012 02:25 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears :heart Beautiful! :clap

MercyInDisguise 03-20-2012 02:34 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears I needed this when C was a bit younger. As we contemplate adding to our family, I am going to print this out and add it to the fridge.

J3K 03-20-2012 03:25 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
My 26yr old mothering self (still inside me and still guilt ridden after all these years) really needed that today.

:heart :ty

PaperMomma 03-20-2012 03:48 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
I'm bawling. :happytears I really needed that today. :ty

LilacPhoenix 03-20-2012 03:59 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
What a great reminder:hug Did you write it?

Amber 03-20-2012 04:45 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:heart :heart

poleidopy 03-20-2012 05:15 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:heart :ty Aisling!:heart

Aisling 03-20-2012 05:25 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by cmljll (Post 4528466)
What a great reminder:hug Did you write it?

Yep...to myself as much as anyone else! :O:heart

Domina 03-20-2012 06:07 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
You just made an INTJ cry.

Chaos Coordinator 03-20-2012 06:21 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by racheepoo (Post 4528145)
That was simply one of the most smashing things I've ever read. :heart

This

Tandem mama 03-20-2012 06:25 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:heart

WanderingJuniper 03-20-2012 07:16 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Bawling :happytears I would really love to share this.

NeshamaMama 03-20-2012 07:18 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears Oh gosh, I bawled. (Let's be real, I'm still crying.) Printing for my fridge. :heart
:ty3

deena 03-20-2012 07:27 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
This is the hope I cling to during this rough period in my life:

Quote:

I see that you're rocking and nursing and bonding with that precious little baby in your lap, and that the love you're steeping them in now will warm the fire of their heart for the rest of their lives, even though it's exhausting in the moment for you. :heart

Aisling 03-20-2012 09:25 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by deena (Post 4528889)
This is the hope I cling to during this rough period in my life:

You and me both, sista :heart :hug

blondie 03-20-2012 09:30 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears

I had an easy day today, but last Thursday, this would have had me sobbing on the floor. Thank you. :heart

curlymopmom 03-20-2012 09:54 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears I am a total mess over here! I am definitely printing this. Thank you. :heart :heart :heart

Heather Micaela 03-20-2012 10:04 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
:happytears
I have been a mom for a decade - actually closer to 11 years - and have been on GCM for most of them. Yet today was a day that TO THE DETAIL was very much like the one you described with the right age kids matching that behavior. I am so exhausted I am delerious and I am staring down the barrel of a bad week that I cannot avoin and most just trudge through.

Your words have been a balm to my soul, and I thank you for that, my friend. :heart

staceylayne 03-20-2012 10:42 PM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
Well. :cry

Well. I was getting on here to start a thread titled "feeling like a failure". Before hitting "new post" I thought, "hmmm...has that sticky always been here?". Glad I read it first.

It has been rough around here lately. Today was rough x10. Tomorrow is scheduled to be crazy, including hosting company (ahem...apparently you've seen my house) and also happens to be my son's fifth birthday.

Today I yelled. I was yelled at. I felt very angry towards my baby for being so needy and for not sleeping. I felt guilty for feeling angry. I walked into a neighbor's home that looks like a magazine spread (totally spotless, perfectly decorated...and she had two young boys). Then I walked back into my home (you described it well) and made a dinner that my children refused to eat.

I'm even now feeling like a bad mom because I don't get the quivering lip and apology from my child when I'm upset with him. He clams up and gets mad.

(Gah! I can't even be encouraged without beating myself up for not having it all figured out. :doh) I'm so weary. And still crying.

Thank you for those timely words. I will read them again and again. :heart


ETA: while writing this I burned the birthday breakfast muffins because I though I'd set the timer, but had not. :mad :sigh It is just not my week.

GlobalMama 03-21-2012 02:13 AM

Re: Hey There Little Mama...(a letter of encouragement)
 
I only have one, I'm an INTJ, and I'm in total tears. I am NOT going to blame pregnancy hormones. That's not it. This was just incredibly beautiful!! :heart :heart :heart


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:01 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2023, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.