Gentle Christian Mothers Community - Oh Mamas!! I am so sad and sick to my stomach!!!

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Oh Mamas!! I am so sad and sick to my stomach!!!

I have a friend that I have known for almost 14 yrs. She has four children like me and they are beautiful kids! Well, I always knew we did some things different in the discipline area and way we care for our kids, but since we have other things in common (no vax, eat organic/healthy, etc) I kindof overlooked the differences. Well, I am just sick to death and heartbroken over what I saw take place last night at her house.

I go over to their house to get some herbal remedies for my baby who is sick, well why I am there she takes her 2 week old baby girl and places her on a bed in a back room and proceeds to shut the door. The baby of course did not like be left alone and started to cry. She was not crying hard at first, but soon began to get really upset. I was shocked when I watched as my friend just ignored the baby's crying and kept on talking to me like nothing was happening. She was chatting with her DH and me and playing with my 2 yr old. He also knew the baby was crying and just kept ignoring her too. After about 15 minutes of this little newborn screaming her head off, I mentioned to my friend that maybe the baby needed something and I encouraged her to go take care of the baby. Well, she told me that she was "fine" and just mad because she did not like not getting her way and being held when she wants. I was like ? I never knew that a newborn could supposidly manipulate the parents..but according to my DF they can and must be taught.. UGH! So anyways, the screaming became utter hysterics and the baby was doing that cough/gasp crying that comes from sheer terror and exhaustion. I was so upset at this and wanted to run get the baby but I had my hands full with my sick toddler who was hooked up to a heart/oxygen monitor and did not want to expose their baby to any germs I had on me. By this point the baby had been screaming hysterically for 30 minutes at least. I had reached my breaking point and told her that "your baby really needs to you hold her now!", she again said in a laughy sing song voice that "the baby loves to be held but that she has to learn paitence and that crying is good for her." I just stood there and stared at her in disbelief. I had heard her let her kids CIO before but they were a bit older and she always acted like she was rushing to get to them...I do not go to her house often so I had no idea until last night exactly how she does this nor how often. Apparantly her DH and her think this is "discipline" and something about Ezzo and To train up a child and stuff?? Anyways... she did not do anything to that baby while I was there except go look in on her once, she even said that she probably was wanting to nurse, but would have to wait for mommy to get time...and then was so proud of herself and said "God blessed her baby with sleep" when the baby finally screamed herself into pure exhausted sleep! I just was so sick I had to bite my tounge not to say what I was thinking! I ended up taking my son home quickly after that and just do not think I can go over there anymore and may decide to end the friendship. I am really upset over this! I do not want my children exposed to that stuff at all. I have never let a baby CIO at any age and never would, I just don't know how any mother can???!! I hate this Ezzo person/train up a child person for whatever junk they are pushing into these moms heads that makes them think it is "good" to do this to a baby! UGH UGH!!!

Oh and one other thing that happened that really annoyed me was they they were making some herbal drinks to help boost my son's immune system cause he has his 7th pneumonia that stems from a weak lung from a previous removed birth defect (he only has a half lung now on his left side). Well they offered him this cup of a bitter herbal drink and he did not want it because it tasted so bad. The DH of my friend looks over at me and tells me " if that were my child I would spank them even if it took 45 times and then they would drink it!" He said this very calmly and matter of fact...I know they spank their kids.. another Ezzo or something thing they have tried to "teach" me about , but they are very quiet people so I figured they only spanked for real disobediance...not something like not wanting to eat or drink something they did not like??!! That made no sense to me and seems awful cruel!! I just looked at him and said "oh dear" and shook my head in shame...I think he got the point. I even told them that we do not hit children in our home, and I have found that even adults refuse food that taste bad.. should we hit them too?

I just kissed my sweet baby's head and told him he did not have to drink something he did not want and I would never hit him for it...

Anyways...I know this is long but I needed to vent to you mamas... I am seriously thinking of dropping this friend because I cannot be around this type of parenting. This crosses the line for me.

**I did cross post this in another mothering forum, but wanted to post it here to get more input and advice from a christian perspective too. Hope that is ok!! :0)
Gosh I feel so bad for their children, especially for the newborn...