rjy9343 |
01-12-2012 04:21 AM |
Re: "Under Loving Command"
I am willing to get on board with the idea that we train our children because I think that train and teach are more or less semantics. I have taught Ivy that I will always come when she calls. I have trained Ivy to believe that I will come when she calls. I have taught Ivy that she must comply, with or with out my help. I have trained Ivy to comply with or without help. I really think that training has a icky connotation because punitive parenting is all about training for first time obedience and keeping kids in their place. But we have trained our children how our home works and (in theory) to obey the house rules. But we are not using force in the sense that we are hurting or threatening our children. Ivy will comply with the rules, end of story. But how we gain her compliance looks different from punitive parents. For example Ivy is not to get into my wallet. If I forget to put my purse out of her reach, then I simply remind her to leave my wallet alone and ask her for it. If she will not give it to me, I take it from her and give her something that is okay for her to open and take apart. I don't hit her hand or tell her she is being bad or anything like that. Ivy is not supposed to climb into the book shelf. We have a door on it that we thought would keep her out of it. :roll When she gets into it, we pull her away and play with her. If we see her go for it, we give her the option of walking away from it without our help. If she chooses our help, then we take her away from it.
But I am not willing to get on board with the idea that I must use the rod to train or teach her. I don't like it when I hear that she runs things or that she rules the roost. A couple of nights ago, my husband's ceo remarked that she is the ruler of our home. I responded that as her spokeswoman, I had a list of requirements for the next place we live and named them.:shifty (A town with a large number of gcms may have been named).I did hear another reference to hickory tea or other ick that or the next night.
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