Stuck....wanting to purge but can't?

[HomeyT]

I desperately want to purge my house! But I'm stuck. I go into each room with good intentions but leave with a few pieces for the trash or sell pile. The room isn't much different than when I started (perhaps cleaner). I also don't have ample stuff either...but really want simple in my home and think that getting rid of stuff will achieve that. But then I get this feeling that maybe I'll need this or that...anyone work through this in themselves? Advice for me?

I'm contemplating a huge purge but keeping the stuff in the garage. Maybe if I live without it for a bit I'll realize I don't need it or want it after all. Anyone do this? How did it go?

[Mama2MeadowRose]

I'm kind of in that predicament right now. I've been going through the home and organizng the past few weeks and getting rid of stuff. THough I've gotten rid of a few big garbage bags of stuff already, I still feel the house is cluttered beyond what it needs to be. But at the same time, if I were in a larger home it wouldnt look like that much stuff, we just dont have that much room to store stuff so it makes it seem more cluttered than it is, especially the 'hot spots'. (According to Flylady, 'hot spots' are places in the home that are used as a temporary storing place where junk piles up, it could be a side table, under the bed, in a particular bin, etc) Do you have an attic? Maybe for now (not to leave it forever of course) you can put the 'iffy' items up there until you decide for sure.

I know I ended up throwing half my artwork out. On one hand, I looked at it from a larger perspective. Do I really need to keep all those? Some of them werent THAT great anyways. But some of them I wanted to keep to remind me that I have some 'talent', lol. So maybe you can do that with a certain category. Maybe its beauty supplies or something, do we really need ALL of those? At the same time, when I went through the bathrooms, I was pleased to find lipsticks and stuff that I'd forgotten about so it was like 'buying' new makeup and I was pleased. :) You'll figure it out as you go through it. But if something holds a LOT of weight sentimentaly, then its okay to keep some of those items. :) Just dont make everything a sentimental value, lol.

[HomeyT]

Yes I have a few hot spots. Unfortunately. And with a small house I need those hot spots for real storage.

I've gotten rid of a lot already....it's that next step! Those things that I hold onto for perceived value either monetary or emotional attachments...but they no longer fit into my current home/life.

[marbles]

Do you have a shed or attic? I've done the trick of boxing those things up and pulling them out a year or more later. Some things are still important, others aren't. It really does help to give perspective.

[Domina]

Items you don't want to purge because of perceived monetary value - sell on Craigslist or eBay? Donate to a women's shelter?

Items with sentimental value - could you take photos and then make a beautiful photo book or album, so that you can always go back and look at them?

[WI Mama05]

layers! I have found purging to be like onion layers. It sounds like you can go through a room and take off the first layer (the garbage and clutter) but get stuck going deeper.

First of all, that's okay :hug . So many of us have emotional attachments or perceived "needs" for items. It's hard to work through and past those. :yes

If you are not okay stopping at the first layer, I suggest taking a bin into each room (I like using bins that are not see-through for this). Place items in the bin that are "iffy". Items you can't get rid of, but recognized you might not need. Put the bin away for 6-12 months. Mark on your calendar to go through it then. You might be surprised how differently you feel. Getting items out of the space and out of sight somehow makes them seem less "needed" IME and I'm SO much more ready to let them go :yes

[crunchymum]

IME, major purging and decluttering is like a skill you learn, and it really does get easier with time. :yes


I think everyone has something different that they need to tell themselves in order to let go. Sometimes I tell myself "someone else can use and love this more than me". Sometimes it's "do I really want to trade my time and energy maintaining this? Is it worth it?". And sometimes, I just need to be ok with the fact that yes, I *may* need or want this *someday*. And that's ok. Can I trust that somehow I'll figure something out when that time comes?

Very sentimental things that don't have a use or can't be displayed and enjoyed in some way, I take a picture of. It's really the memories attached to those items that I value, and I picture can recall those memories, I don't always need the "thing".

A trick I learned when sorting through things that may be hard to part with, is to have someone trusted work with you in sorting, and have that person hold the object for you as you make your decisions. Sometimes just the act of touching and holding something can make us feel more attached to it, and less objective. :yes


My friend who's a profession organizer uses these steps to help clients with purging and organizing, to get CLEAR:

C atagorize
L et go
E lect a home
A ppropriate containers
R evisit


Like Kim said, there are layers. The first layer is pretty easy - obvious garbage, things that are worn out or broken, etc. when you get to the next layer, it really is good to start by categorizing - grouping like items together so you can really see what you have. You can do that room by room. I used post it notes and banker's boxes to do this, so I could close up the lids for the day and stack them neatly. It's motivating for me to see progress, even if it's things going into labeled boxes.

Letting go can be tough, but again, ask yourself if the future possibility of someday needing something is worth the time and energy and space you are giving it *right now*.

Electing a home is the whole "a place for everything, and everything in it's place". Work with the habits of your family. Give things a home as close to the point of use as possible, make it really easy to use and put away things. As you are doing this, you may realize you can let go of more stuff. :tu

Once all that is done, that's when you can figure out appropriate containers for the things you do wind up keeping. :yes I always did it backwards - I'd see a cool bin or basket, and I'd buy it and just stuff things into it. :lol once you quantify what you a tidally have and use, figuring out how to store it becomes easier.

Revisit is a reminder that we are never truly *done* - our lives are not static, new things enter our home, as well as different seasons of our lives. Revisiting helps us figure out what's working and what's not anymore. :heart


Sorry if this was totally unhelpful! I just know for me, having the bigger picture helps me move forward, especially when it comes to getting rid of stuff. And I'm totally reminding myself of this stuff!!!!

[bclemons84]

The way that I learned how to purge things was with my husband's/or a friend's help. I have them help me decide what is important and what isn't. I always feel amazing after a purge and they are great motivators! After it is gone, I have never missed any of the stuff I have purged. :shrug3

[MegMarch]

:hug2 I am a slow purger. I like stuff. I also hate it, and wish I could be a minimalist. But I am just not that girl.

I have a donation pile that I need to call and have picked up soon since it is outgrowing its box! When I'm in my closet and think "ugh, that shirt is cute but never feels right" I toss it on the pile. If I'm crabby and that gizmo in the kitchen falls out and hits me :mad it goes to the pile. Then a few weeks later I get in "hate my stuff!" mode again.

If I just try to have a big purge session I end up trying on all my clothes, remembering old stories, calling my mom, and surrounded by stuff that I still want and now need to reorganize.

For clothes- is it comfortable? flattering? does it work with my other things? and the big one... does it need to be ironed? because seriously, just no.

For makeup- can I wear it without a lot of other makeup and it looks good? does it feel good on my face? no weird smells?

For electronics I remind myself that IF I ever need one again I can splurge on a nice new one and that right now another family shopping at the thrift store can actually be enjoying this one.

[HomeyT]

:hug2 I am a slow purger. I like stuff. I also hate it, and wish I could be a minimalist. But I am just not that girl.


i think i am a minimalist at heart...and desperately want my space to resonate with that. so i have the desire...i'm just getting hung up on some 'emotional' attachment. but unless i over come these i'll never have the minimalist home i know will echo how i want to live my life.

thanks all for the tips. it's all great stuff ladies! and i'll piece all the stuff that resonates with me to find a plan of action that will work.

[Firebird Rising]

I'm doing 100 things into boxes and taken to thrift stores each week by the end of the week EACH week. That could be as small as a matchbox car or... but it has to go.... I'm done with all the junk laying around.

[WaitPatientlyOnTheLord]

I'm doing 100 things into boxes and taken to thrift stores each week by the end of the week EACH week. That could be as small as a matchbox car or... but it has to go.... I'm done with all the junk laying around.

100 things sounds intimidating to me, but I really like this idea!:rockon maybe I could do 25 things...:think

[HomeyT]

Wow 100 things each week. I'm gonna aim for 100 things total right now ;)
I've been getting serious about my wardrobe, if I come across something in my closet I don't like or wear its getting boxed up, also there are a few pieces I had to throw out after wearing them one last time....lol!

[Niphredil]

So do 20 things each week. In five weeks you'll be at 100. And you can move on from there. :heart