Any "Messies" Who Now Maintain a Tidy Home?

[chelsea]

Is it possible? I am getting SO discouraged!! I want to hear inspirational stories of messies who managed to get on track with their housekeeping and maintain a tidy and organized home for a decent length of time!
Thanks!! :heart

[FindingMyWay]

I'm Sarah and I used to be a messy!!

Seriously.. up until about 3 years ago I was a messy... but it was stressing me out big time. So I finally decided that if the messy surroundings is stressing me out then maybe I'm not "wired" to be a messy.. (Made since in my brain)

Practically- I started by purging..my house looked WAAAAY worse before it got better and I had to retrain my kids to my new way of cleaning .. everything has a place, everything gets put away before we move on.. It was TOUGH at first, but getting your kids on board is HUGE..
I've been in my current home for one year, it hasn't been messy at all. Company can drop by any time.. I am not bragging , I'm sharing since you asked! 3 years ago I was like that facebook meme "I get more cleaning done the 10 minutes before guest come over than I do all week" That's how I grew up too--hurry up and clean grandma's coming over so it was a huge shift in thinking for me.


HTH :)

[klpmommy]

I honestly believe that once I am past the baby & toddler stage I'll be able to maintain tidy.

[JenLovie]

I honestly believe that once I am past the baby & toddler stage I'll be able to maintain tidy.

I hope this is where I'll find myself in a couple of years. There are a few habits I have started now (empty dishwasher while the boys are in high chairs so I can start the day with it empty).

[slingmamaof4]

We go back and forth. Right now it is messier than I want. Mostly because we have too much stuff. So I need to go through and donate a bunch of stuff. That is our number one problem.

But what helps me make sure I keep it tidier and I need to start doing this again...we used to have a friend and her kids come over every Thursday to visit. I didn't want my house to be messy when she came, so I knew that it was motivation for me to keep my house clean. And it worked pretty well. We even had friends that stopped by unannounced caroling last December and we were able to invite them in for cookies and hot chocolate. The house was actually tidy!

It isn't nearly as tidy now as I would like it to be. So I'm with you at the moment. I'm willing to be part of an accountability thread or something though if you'd like.

[Snake_Girl]

Pick me, pick me! I have SO been there! I truly believe in my heart that if I had my way I would be the laziest person on earth. I have literally gone weeks without doing a lick of housework except for washing dishes because there were no more clean ones and doing laundry because everyone was out of clean clothes. Now I have a routine that I follow and my laundry gets done every day, my dishes are always done and our house stays picked up because we do a little each day and everyone pitches in. It was SO much worse when they were babies but now it's so easy as long as I do it, LOL! I really didn't mind the mess but I didn't realize how much stress and tension it was actually causing! Once I realized how stressful having a messy house was to me it really motivated me to change it. I'm doing FlyLady at my own pace. I started a couple of weeks before Halloween and I'm still on day 10. BUT I've got a home control journal, a before bed routine and a morning routine that make my life SO much easier! I have to gradually add on new stuff or I'll get overwhelmed and throw it all out the window.

[StoryOfGrace]

:popcorn

[tazmom]

My house is a million times better than it was a few years ago. It started while I was pregnant with dd3 and has been a long journey. I don't feel like I've "arrived" yet, but I don't know that I ever will. It takes making a conscious effort every day for me to keep my house tidy.

My journey step by step:

1) Whole house declutter and cleaning of all the hidden spaces - pregnancy hormones were at least partially to blame for this

2) Motivated Moms - started with getting only 1 or 2 things done each day, but praising myself for doing something more than before. Continue working with this from now on.

3) Another whole house declutter - less stuff went away this time, but some things got reorganized to make it more manageable

4) Another whole house declutter - Seriously!!! How did I get so much stuff!!!

5) Move - I hate packing the things more than I hate getting rid of the things

6) Move again - see above :lol I also was carefully looking at everything as I unpacked to decide if I really needed to bother putting it away.

7) Work on habits - I took one problem thing at a time (dishes, laundry, floors, etc) decided what my goal was for it, worked on figuring out a solution that was realistic, and practiced it until it became a habit. Then started on the next one.

8) Move again - This house is half the size of the previous house. I have just enough space for everything I need without crowding, but not enough space for any extra. It's also a lot easier to keep the smaller space clean.

What worked for me isn't going to work for everyone. I don't recommend moving 3 times in 15 months, it wasn't fun. There were times when it all seemed impossible, like when dd3 hit her super destructive phase. I have an awesome dh who does a ton of work around the house too and has worked beside me and encourages me when I want to give up.

I'm not perfect. I haven't done dishes in a couple days now (although dh has) and I'm about 4 loads behind on laundry. I didn't vacuum yesterday and there are toys all over the kids bedroom floors. It's still way better than before.

[TenderLovingWillow]

I'm getting there.... But not yet. I am way better than I was 3 years ago. I am better than I was 6 months ago, and Lord willing next year I'll be better than I am now.

[HomeyT]

My problem is getting others on board. Even Dh, he cleans, but he doesn't get that piling things in corners is not cleaning!! He'll mop the floors but not before tidying the counters. Lol! It's helpful and frustrating! ESP since with baby I do need help. I too think that when the kids are able to help things will change... But wonder if that'll happen. I think it's creating good habits. As the ladies here have said. So subbing for more habit forming ideas ;)

[OnlyBelieve]

I used to be very messy. I remember my mother telling me that when I grow up and she comes over to my house, she would not even drink a glass of water because of the mess she was predicting I would have.
Well, just last week, she told me that she has never seen my house messy!
I am no longer messy. I do not know how it really happened....it was a loooong slow process that took over ten years. Yes, decluttering played a part; yes, Flylady had a role; yes, we all work hard to maintain a state of cleanliness and neatness.

I cannot maintain a very clean house when I have small children or when I am working outside the home. Those times call for survival mode. Right now, the children are 8 and 11 and we homeschool. We all pitch in, and dh does his fair share.

[JustMandy]

I'm a recovering messy. :giggle

I really don't mind messes and can find much better uses for my time. :shifty But then we put out house on the market. I purged like crazy. I bought shelves and bins for everything. When everything has a place, it's less likely to stay out.

Now we've been in our new place for 3 months and after the initial unpacking phase, it's never been too messy for company...that's not true, there were a couple weeks when Levi's toys threatened to take over the living room. I bet it was before I bought all the bins and put the toys in them. It's not been messy like that since.

[Niphredil]

Me. I'll be back.

[greenleafknitter]

:popcorn

I've gotten much better since having A. After he was born I put together a weekly routine that I more or less stick to. Laundry and dishes are done every day. Bathrooms, kitchen, changing sheets, etc, are on the weekly rotation.

I was never on top of things before kids, as I was working outside the home full time and was too tired once I got off work. But with my 2 littles adding to the mess I have to clean and declutter in order to keep my sanity. It's never ever ever close to perfect and I don't think it will be until our family leaves the baby/toddler stage.

[chelsea]

I've been in my current home for one year, it hasn't been messy at all. Company can drop by any time.. I am not bragging , I'm sharing since you asked! 3 years ago I was like that facebook meme "I get more cleaning done the 10 minutes before guest come over than I do all week" That's how I grew up too--hurry up and clean grandma's coming over so it was a huge shift in thinking for me.


HTH :)

Don't apologize, I'm feeling encouraged by reading all your stories! And what you said totally sums up my goal... I want my home to be in a state where I am excited at the thought of unexpected guests... and not running around in terror trying to declutter before they get there, and then keeping them out of certain rooms when they are here. I don't have company over much because each time entails major panic tidying, and my boys and I NEED to be able to invite friends over!

[Daria_Aleksandrovna]

:yes leopards do change their spots when it comes to cleaning - I am so un-awesome and weak so if it can happen to me, it must happen to better people easily :) No, really. I was serious messie, not someone who just sometimes left dishes overnight...

The following helped over 6 years of married life:
- one load of laundry a day (so even with cloth-bummed baby, I do about 20-25 laundries per month, so there are still days off)
- intolerance to non-kitchen clutter in kitchen
- do dishes while babies are in the kitchen eating lunch/dinner (easier if kids are eating in the kitchen rather than somewhere else in the house..)
- hardest but useful to know that everything has its place (probably took years to cultivate) - the more you know things have their designated place the more intolerance to clutter
- having very regular visitors/playdates over :bag

as tazmom said whole-house declutter after declutter is good - HBC challenge threads here are good fun))

[Tandem mama]

I struggle. Dh isn't home much, cuppycake is heck bent on injuring herself or someone else (today she ate half a bottle of teething tablets when I tried to do dishes. I immediately abandoned all cleaning attempts) so I really just don't do as much as I'd like.

Dh is...absent minded...and no matter how much I remind him he NEVER puts things where they go. Mostly our house is clean as in dirt and whatnot. It's just...piles of clean clothes and whatnot. Toys. My kids seem to think that cleaning is a death sentence

[jtidwell]

I'm still messy, but not as messy as I used to be! :bag I think three big things had to change in my life:

* Daily and weekly habits. For instance, the flylady "shiny sink before bedtime" concept forces me to get the kitchen dealt with before going to bed. And I'm much better now about getting the vacuum cleaner out and doing something with it every two or three days (it doesn't have to be The Whole Darned House, just a room or two).

* Getting used to clean, uncluttered spaces. This is my DH's problem: he's so used to clutter and dirt and disorganization that he literally doesn't see it. But I no longer have the tolerance for such that I used to have, because I now LIKE clean spaces and clutter bugs me! And if it bugs me, I'm inspired to do something about it.

* Figuring out where everything is supposed to go. My clutter problem is mostly an organizational problem; uncategorized things end up in random piles! So this means that at least every few months, I have to rethink what's working and what's not in various rooms. Sometimes storage bins and shelves are the right answer. Sometimes a "deep decluttering" is more appropriate -- I just need to get rid of stuff so that I have more physical space and less cognitive load.

* Occasionally, having my mother or mother-in-law visit. That makes me look at the house from their point of view, not mine! And if I don't like what I see when I roleplay my mother, I clean it up until it's acceptable. :)

[Waterlogged]

I'm worlds better than I was, though it still falls apart when life is super stressful....

[LadybugSam]

yes, me! me! :mrgreen

well, it will never be showcase quality but i have been doing really good at keeping my house nice. :yes I am not ashamed if people come by to visit me at the last minute. I'll pick up toys in the livingroom and put away random clothes/dishes that have strayed but nothing major like it used to be. We always have dinner at the kitchen table too :yes even if i am clearing it right before we eat, we can always have dinner at the table :)

i think the thing that helped the most was chaining chores. Like, i wouldn't start cooking if there was a full sink. Even if it meant dinner was late, i did dishes before i started. After i put the oldest to bed, i clean up the livingroom and make sure everything is put away. I throw out trash on my desk as my computer is turning on in the morning, etc.

[Lily]

I'm getting there.... But not yet. I am way better than I was 3 years ago. I am better than I was 6 months ago, and Lord willing next year I'll be better than I am now.
I love your attitude!!

That's kind where I am. We did a huge declutter 6 months ago and have been doing much better since then (who in their right mind needs 17 mixing bowls, 5 strainers, 10 cake pans :crazy No wonder I couldn't keep up!). Coming out of the 1 yr baby fog has really helped too!

Doling out toys has been a huge help. We have 4 baskets of toys, plus the instruments that store inside a drum and a little people ark. I only bring out one basket or the drum or the ark. It does wonders for my sanity to have everything else locked in a cabinet and only have a few toys out. She doesn't need 50 toys out at once! For playdates, we will bring out one extra basket of toys to play with while our guests are there.

Finding fixes for reoccuring problems. I never put my shoes away. NEVER! So there will be a dozen pairs of shoes through out the dining room and kitchen. It perfect land, I would be able to put my shoes up as soon as I take them off and everything would be organized awesomely. So instead of stressing myself out with something unachievable, for me at least, I have a laundry basket that stays on top of the piano for my shoes. They are picked up. DH doesn't find pairs everywhere and I can easily hide the basket for expected company.

DH unloads the dishwasher at night. :heart This is a big one for me! I have yet to figure out why but chickadee will only give me enough time to either unload the dishwasher or load it but not both at the same time. So I load and do a few hand wash dishes and he unloads. I always have dishes to do but it's not consuming my countertops. We eat special so meals tend to dirty lots of dishes.

Laundry is always going! Only when I'm sick or seriously hurt does my washer and dryer get a day off. I used to try to do all the laundry in one day. Yep that never seemed to work out. I also don't mix people's clothes. Dh's clothes stay separate from mine, etc so I'm not sorting on top of washing, drying, hanging, folding, putting away.

[Cat]

:popcorn

[Katydid]

:cup

[mipennsn]

:popcorn

[Katydid]

I've still got a long way to go, but I will share my new laundry system that is working for me. I have three hampers in which we put dirty clothes: one in our bedroom, one in the bathroom and one in the kitchen. Once a week I take all the hampers to the basement and sort them into three laundry baskets: colors, whites/lights and towels/bedding and then immediately put the hampers back in their spots. Then, throughout the week, I wash one or two loads a day and, here is the key to success for me: I fold each load straight out of the dryer and then carry the stack upstairs, putting the clean things away as I go. No putting clean clothes into laundry baskets to be folded/put away later, only to have them sitting around all week mixing with the dirty stuff. If it's not clean and folded, ready to be put away, it doesn't come upstairs, simple as that. That one thing has really helped me tame the laundry monster. Now we are only drowning in dirty laundry, not clean as well. :wink

Now I just need to get a system down for dishes (we have no dishwasher) :shifty

[chelsea]

Thanks for sharing your encouraging stories, ladies! More, more! ;)

[mokamoto]

I've still got a long way to go, but I will share my new laundry system that is working for me. I have three hampers in which we put dirty clothes: one in our bedroom, one in the bathroom and one in the kitchen. Once a week I take all the hampers to the basement and sort them into three laundry baskets: colors, whites/lights and towels/bedding and then immediately put the hampers back in their spots. Then, throughout the week, I wash one or two loads a day and, here is the key to success for me: I fold each load straight out of the dryer and then carry the stack upstairs, putting the clean things away as I go. No putting clean clothes into laundry baskets to be folded/put away later, only to have them sitting around all week mixing with the dirty stuff. If it's not clean and folded, ready to be put away, it doesn't come upstairs, simple as that. That one thing has really helped me tame the laundry monster. Now we are only drowning in dirty laundry, not clean as well. :wink

Now I just need to get a system down for dishes (we have no dishwasher) :shifty

Thank you for this!!! :heart

For dishes, before we got the dishwasher my system was this- basin in the sink, all dishes go there after the meal. Boil water on the stove, pour it in on top of dish soap after the dishes are in. Separate silverware into a smaller, but big enough cup, and soak as well. Get the kids into bed and then come back to dishes where the food wipes off easily, if it is even still there! Rinse and put on dish drainer or dry and stack back on shelves. The morning dishes I often couldn't get to before leaving, but with this system, they weren't hard to do while the kids ate their after school snack. The key for me was routine attached to other always done routines - like baths and food. ;) Hope that helps! :heart

[jujubnme]

:cup I'm with you chelsea. We've dug ourselves into a deep pit after I started WOH 30 hours/week, we had some medical crises and then stopped inviting people over to the house regularly :shifty... oh, and we're coming on 12 years in our house and need to do some serious decluttering/reorganizing. :bag

[SnowWhite]

:popcorn

[Garland]

I'm a Messy by nature, but I LOVE a clean & organized house. I've been working on it and have definitely improved.

[peekaboomama]

Oh I need this! I've been improving since college when my room mate lost it on me :blush but I have such a long way to go.

[Fireside]

My home is not "neat" by any means, but I do find that regular decluttering REALLY helps!

I also try to do a quick pick-up most nights after the kids go to bed (although some nights--like last night--I'm just too tired).

[Daria_Aleksandrovna]

Oh I need this! I've been improving since college when my room mate lost it on me :blush but I have such a long way to go.

Me too. :blush
That's probably more typical in college days though...Most people do grow out of it)))

[hey mommy]

I totally could if i didn't have a 3 year old tornado who makes messes faster than i can clean them. :doh :hissyfit

[Leslie_JJKs_mom]

At one time I was a messy until I found that part of my being so grumpy all the time was my messy house. It was much easier when DD was a baby and toddler but now I am pregnant and she has dolls, beads and leggos I am struggling again. Yes it can be done. I force myself to clean non stop for 15 min. every day at some point. I am always shocked at how much I get done. Most times even with a huge holiday mess I find that just making myself do that much gives me the motivation to get it all done.

Years back when I did the huge cleaning to my house it took a week, but then again I took everything down and cleaned it. I wiped books, shelves knick knacks and even all my walls. I am not sure what suddenly got into me but I loved it. I have never gone back to that ' messy' again. Yes my house gets cluttered now and then but it has never taken more then an hour to get it right again.:hugheart

[hey mommy]

It's a big contributor to my grumpiness too. Especially since the house is so small. But i get overwhelmed easily or irritated by Sammy's messes, that i just give up for a while. My goal for my winter break is to get it cleaned and organized.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Hopetobe]

:cup

[JustMandy]

I had a :idea moment while I was vacuuming. One of the reasons I can keep my house cleaner now is because I let go of "all or nothing" and "if you're going to do it, do it right" mentality.

My living room is split up by a sectional. On one side of the sectional, Levi has created a boobie trap of toys, games and anything else that cought his eye today. I don't have time to deal with that right now. On the other side, it's basically clear but needed vacuuming. Before I would have told myself that I needed to pick up the whole living room before I could vacuum and one of two things would have happened. 1) I would have started picking up the living room and found myself 20 steps later painting the bathroom and having finished nothing that got me to that point. Or 2) being so overwhelmed at the *thought* of cleaning I quit before I start.

Instead, I pulled out the vacuum, cleaned what I could in a couple minutes and moved on. Sure my living room is not done, but it's better and better is good. Better is a total win. Better is now my goal and with this attainable goal my house is MUCH more clean (and I don't feel as guilty :rockon) than when I thought completion was my goal.

[Mert]

I clicked on this thread to see this strange creature you call a "Messy with a clean house", but I've actually been inspired. Even a messy has her limits when it comes to disorganization and dare I say it... chaos. Thanks for sharing your stories and tips!! :grin

[Leslie_JJKs_mom]

Oh I remember what first got me cleaning. Do you remember that british show where the two older ladies would go into filthy houses and make them clean. Yeah one was disgusting and the bacteria was so bad they wore hazmat suits in the kitchen. That just struck something in me even though my house was not that bad and I started cleaning getting all squeamish over the memories of the black gooey stuff they showed on the stove top in the show. I am enough of a germaphobe that it set something off in me. Yep I am a germaphobe that can collect clutter. Germ free clutter that is! LOL

[LadybugSam]

Oh I remember what first got me cleaning. Do you remember that british show where the two older ladies would go into filthy houses and make them clean. Yeah one was disgusting and the bacteria was so bad they wore hazmat suits in the kitchen. That just struck something in me even though my house was not that bad and I started cleaning getting all squeamish over the memories of the black gooey stuff they showed on the stove top in the show. I am enough of a germaphobe that it set something off in me. Yep I am a germaphobe that can collect clutter. Germ free clutter that is! LOL

was it called "How clean is your house"?

i watch hoarders when i need to declutter. :shifty

[Leslie_JJKs_mom]

I think so and LOL so I am not the only one who twitches at other peoples messes and gets the cleaning bug moving.

[JenLovie]

I think so and LOL so I am not the only one who twitches at other peoples messes and gets the cleaning bug moving.

After visiting a specific family member I always want to declutter and clean.

[chelsea]

was it called "How clean is your house"?

i watch hoarders when i need to declutter. :shifty

HAHAHA, I thought I was the only one who watched this show for inspiration!! :roll

[Living My Dream]

It is doable. I'm midway in the transition..

Sent from my LT26i using Tapatalk 2

[chelsea]

I think a huge problem of mine is I see the mess, and want to clean it, but I sit down and start to "declutter" and I get so overwhelmed by all the decisions (Throw this away, give it away, or keep it? Put this book back on the bookshelf or leave it in a pile beside the bed since I'm partway though it, along with the 40 other books in partway through reading? Throw away this small toy or try and find the game it belongs to that will not be a complete set anymore if I throw it away? Move this item... but to where? Throw this magazine away, or browse through it and make sure I read all the good articles first that prompted me to bring it home in the first place?) that I start to feel panicky and skittish and lose hope that I will ever make a difference. I can sit for a few hours and barely make a dent in the way a room looks and it makes me feel hopeless and incapable and makes me want to ignore it and escape by browsing the internet or read a book (or even read a book about decluttering, hoping that somehow a magic trick written about in the book will erase all my ineptness :doh ) or anything else but declutter.

[Soliloquy]

I think a huge problem of mine is I see the mess, and want to clean it, but I sit down and start to "declutter" and I get so overwhelmed by all the decisions (Throw this away, give it away, or keep it? Put this book back on the bookshelf or leave it in a pile beside the bed since I'm partway though it, along with the 40 other books in partway through reading? Throw away this small toy or try and find the game it belongs to that will not be a complete set anymore if I throw it away? Move this item... but to where? Throw this magazine away, or browse through it and make sure I read all the good articles first that prompted me to bring it home in the first place?) that I start to feel panicky and skittish and lose hope that I will ever make a difference. I can sit for a few hours and barely make a dent in the way a room looks and it makes me feel hopeless and incapable and makes me want to ignore it and escape by browsing the internet or read a book (or even read a book about decluttering, hoping that somehow a magic trick written about in the book will erase all my ineptness :doh ) or anything else but declutter.

:hugheart

Have you read "Clutter Control: Your House on a Diet?" It's good. It discusses a really good strategy for just this dilemma and also briefly addresses the emotional reasons we keep too many things.

One thing you can try is to box up "undecided" things and write the date on the box. If you don't need to open the box for 6 months, donate it without opening it. You obviously didn't need it. Another thing to remember, if you're tempted to keep things because "I might need this someday," is that even if you need it someday, you won't be able to use it if you can't find it. Everything must have a logical place. If you cannot find a place for it, it goes.

Can I make a comment as a non-messy? every single one of my friends who comments to me that she wishes her house were more organized and cleaner just has too much stuff, imo. Putting everything away in a room should not take more than 10 minutes. Holding on to material possessions will rob you of the peace you could be experiencing in your home.

Sent from my DROIDX using Tapatalk 2

[nessnco]

I'm bringing this up since it ties in with the 2013 decluttering thread.

I'm a messie much better than I was and most of the time ready for visitors.

I do find fly ladies pick up 27 really helpful for me, its pretty much how I've decluttered. I also do things during the ads on tv. :blush

[Lily]

Going right along with LisaM's boxing up method - I have the last used method. DH is packrat and drives me bonkers with the "might use it someday". If it hasn't been used in the last 4 to 6 months then it needs a new home. If you haven't used it in half a year, is it really that important or special or useful? This of course doesn't apply to holiday decorations or seasonal clothing.

[marigold]

When I lived alone I managed to keep fairly neat, just one hot spot collection point to tidy regularly and it only took a few min....Now with kids and hubby I'm a disaster.:ph All my life I've been told I'm too neat, organized, etc... but I can't seem to get on top of this...my kitchen counter is a cesspool and things get lost there regularly:bag , it is spreading to the table. Thank-you for giving me hope.:yes