Hypothetically, would you separate littrrmates?

[Johns_Gal]

:shifty
Dh and I found a sweet pair of dogs up for adoption today. Nice little "his andhers" set. :giggle. About 3 years old, clearly brother and sister.

We really should just have one dog for now. I felt totally unafraid of this set, they were so gentle, outgoing and confident, and the female was so perfect for me. This is a pretty big deal for me. :shifty I used to love dogs, a few nasty experiences later and it takes an act of God for me to like one.

The owner surrendered them, said they didn't get along with their other dogs. So idk if they are too bonded to function as normal dogs or what... fyi, I don't like dogs raised with a sibling as a rule, one alwasys turns into a hot mess. But if I just took her, what about separation anxiety?

Oh, and she's very pregnant, and they'd spay her. I really hate that, and am concerned about what a late term spay would do to her... would she think she has pups to protect when she doesn't?

I really wish we could take both, but dh is hesitant. He likes the male, but I am the one who has been wanting a dog.

[PrincessAnika]

hypothetically, and realistically speaking, no i wouldn't split them, i'd take both (and NOT let them spay her until AFTER the pups were old enough to be weaned and sold). actually....i have taken both. they were much younger though - pups/babies - and of the 3 pups left, one was spoken for, and we took the other two.

wait, there's a vet that is willing to basically abort the pups to fix her? or am i reading that wrong.....if i'm reading/understanding that right, thats a MAJOR red flag - completely unethical. they won't spay a cat or dog thats in season....

[SnowWhite]

hypothetically, and realistically speaking, no i wouldn't split them, i'd take both (and NOT let them spay her until AFTER the pups were old enough to be weaned and sold).

:thumbsup I don't think that the factor is so much that they're littermates. I think it's that they've been together for 3 years and are bonded to one another. They've already lost their owner and I think that separating them would be hard for them. And just not really fair if there is potential that someone could keep them together.

I think it's so much easier having two dogs. They really seem to like the company and I don't feel as bad when I have to leave them, because they have each other.

[Johns_Gal]

She is in a kill shelter, so yes. The employees were unaware she was even pregnant, though because of her shaved belly, it is very obvious. I get why they spay heavily pregnant animals, I do, but I still hate it. They don$t spay until adoption, but I would have no say in the matter, she'd be spayed once I paid her fee.

I would adopt both if I could.

[swimming with sharks]

IME sibling pairs that were adopted together bonded to each other and not to the new owner. :td They were ALWAYS a 'hot mess'. :yes You know that dogs that aren't bonded to you are 'difficult' at best. I wouldn't do it to children, but based on what I've seen (used to adoptions through rescue) and it would make me sad, I'd only take one.

IRT the late spay. :cry It is sad, but there's NO WAY a kill shelter is going to let 6-8 more dogs be born just to put them down when they're not found homes. It's not what you or I would do :sadno Having said that, the few girl dogs I've seen that happen to, I haven't seen the issue of 'protecting' the pups occur. Most bounce back super fast and keep right on going.

[Johns_Gal]

Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. We played with them in the yard together and they were focused on us and so, so sweet, but the brother did get all huffy at a male dog in the next yard over. Other than that, the male adored DS, and both were.just great.

We get to a standstill, dh and I, where he says if I want a dog, I should get one, but then he likes one and wants it, and not the one I would like to have. :/ He likes Pitts and aussies and other inaapprorpriate-for-our-situation dogs, and- blergh.

I really want a dog, so very much. We have been looking for so long. She doesn't scare me at all and I,d love to bring her home. But DH- I don't know. If she were eighty pounds and a Pitt he'd be all over it.

[Mommainrwanda]

But you're falling in love with her when she's with her bonded brother. Who knows where her personality could head if you tried to transition her to being an only dog. :shrug Obviously you'd hope for the best, but 3 years is an awfully long time to be together, IMO.

She sounds nice, but I think think there are too many variables for it to be a good situation. I don't know if this is the situation where you want to end your dog search.

[Johns_Gal]

Yep. 8 have had dogs separated from littermates later in life: one thrived and was the best companion. The other... wow, no.

[crunchymum]

:hugheart that's a hard decision. I personally would not take littermates. :no in fact, my in laws just had to re-home one of their 2 dogs that were sisters... They weren't bonding with my in laws, and the cute "playing" that they were doing at adoption became constant fighting. :(

[Domina]

Personally, I wouldn't separate a bonded pair, whether they were littermates or not. Nor would I allow a late-term spay, if I had the choice.

[Johns_Gal]

Kindle hates me, hope this posts.

Rh is talking about going overseas again. I do not want to be here alone, again, without a dog. Last time... well. We live in a strange area, and being 100% alone with my baby was nervewracking. This time, better plan in place involving burglar alarms, a more secure house, a caretaker we already know coming by weekly, and a dog. I won't do it again if I don't feel safe, and for a couple legitimate reasons, I want extra eyes and ears in the house beside my own. I was a twitchy Jen for awhile there.
I don't need teeth, I don't need bulk, I just need a small sturdy dog to keep me company and bark at coyotes. ;)

[Mother of Sons]

I think 2 is better than one. I would take them both probably

[WanderingJuniper]

No. As sweet as the dog(s) may be if they didn't meet the list we both wanted and agreed on we wouldn't be getting the dogs. I don't understand the spay/pregnancy situation entirely but from what I understand I wouldn't want to be the reason the puppies were aborted. That would be too much for me even if the mama dog didn't have any anxiety afterwards I would have trouble knowing.

We rushed into getting a dog when we started looking. It was the wrong decision made from heart not heart and mind. I would be willing to wait for the right dog to meet both heart and mind criteria. :hug

[Sonata]

I totally, totally understand wanting a dog while your husband is away. I feel exactly the same way. :yes I just need someone who will be alert and ready with a bark while I'm asleep! (I mean, the dog sleeps too, but my last girl was ready to pop up and wake the household if we so much had a raccoon prowling around the chicken coops!:tu)

I'd be kind of leaning "no" with this situation. But I would think you could get some more information. Why don't you take just the girl out for a while and play with you, and see how she reacts? IDK what breed it is, but some things I would look for would be (varies by breed, I know) after playing and cuddling for a while would be:
-following me, at least with eyes, if I moved away from her while talking to her
-watching me, and kiddo, with ears up and happy face
-going into play bow, or ears back w/ tail wag, when we approach; submissive but not too submissive

The key is if she's able to do all this without her brother there. If you play with her without her brother and she becomes nervous, or is constantly looking over her shoulder for him, or becomes too submissive or tries to hide, or otherwise acts discomfited.... then you have some more information.

[Macky]

Is there any chance that they would let her go without the spay? We adopted from the shelter in a city an hour away from us. We told them that we preferred that our own vet did the spay rather than the shelter. All they required was that our vet sign a form saying the proceedure was done and return it to the shelter within a specified period of time. Your shelter might draw up a contract whereby you are required to spay the dog within ___ days of her litter being born. This is all provided you're willing to do everything involved with the birth and finding the pups a home.

[itzj]

I would take both (and all the pups). Then if it's still too much you could find the extra a gentle home rather than risk the poor thing being killed in the shelter. I don't think it's just chance that you were called into this situation with your compassion for this dog. :heart

[Johns_Gal]

Yep, you got it, Sonata.

I have been looking for ages. Tried to get a sheltie and it was a circus that broke my heart. I've turned down several who weren't right: I know the.temperament I'm looking torr and refuse to settle.for different. She seems to have it, and is the first dog I have met who has it 7and* is the right size/build.

I may go hang out with just her this afternoon if dh wakes up in time. That, and if I could get some straightforward feedback from him, that would be SWELL. :mutter

If he goes overseas, I have no family to go to, no one who will take any interest in us. Db's mom was around last time, 300 miles away, but i visited uer aand she called me every week. Now she's a retired RVer. I was alone and it was awful. I'd kind of rather try and fail than have another 17 months like that. If you've never lived alone with your child in a place that makes you feel unsafe, I never wish it upon you.

I am determined thsbtime will be much better.

---------- Post added at 06:31 PM ---------- Previous post was at 06:26 PM ----------

Is there any chance that they would let her go without the spay? We adopted from the shelter in a city an hour away from us. We told them that we preferred that our own vet did the spay rather than the shelter. All they required was that our vet sign a form saying the proceedure was done and return it to the shelter within a specified period of time. Your shelter might draw up a contract whereby you are required to spay the dog within ___ days of her litter being born. This is all provided you're willing to do everything involved with the birth and finding the pups a home.

I shall ask. :) I doubt it though, it is a huge, busy shelter and I figure they don't have time to agree to anything other than usual procedure. But I will ask. I don$t mind and have whelped litters before, and she is small so it's not like she is a lab.with a belly of ten or something. The adoption fees are highish, I'd be looking at $300 for the pair + vet care and puppy altering. Not your usual $120 and done. :doh

[kiloyd]

What if you agree to foster the puppies?

I'd go and visit with each dog separately and see how they act. I agree, it's not the fact that they are littermates, it's the fact that they've lived together for 3 years and are now in a strange place only knowing each other.

There is no way I'd agree to adopt knowing they were going to spay her when she is obviously pregnant. I'd wait til she had them, then of course you'd have to wait 6 weeks after that.

As for only adopting one, maybe. I'd have to meet them.

Would you even consider both?

[Sonata]

What kind of dogs are they?

Personally, I think your opinion has more weight than your husband's, if you are the one who needs the dog and will be mostly taking care of it. My DH has been out of town, and I called him about our immediate need for a replacement dog, and to "ask" him what he thought. (And that, um, I'd already brought home a "foster" dog!) He listened to me, and said "well, it sounds like you've already decided about this." I replied that if he was going out of town, I needed a dog. Period. He said, "well, I am going to have a lot more traveling coming up." That means "yes" to me!

I don't mean to act like I disrespect my husband's opinion; it matters to me. But at the same time, I'm the one who is alone in the house most of the day, every day, and we're the ones left behind when he goes on business. I'll do all the training and walking and feeding. It's not an equal decision.

I hope you find the right balance with your husband; that sounds like it's a big part of this problem and discussion. :hug

[Johns_Gal]

Exactly, Sonata. Any dig we get he will probably teach to sit, and play in the yard with it a couple times a month. The end. He is my beloved, but getting an honest yes or no from him is hard, and I'm tired of putting my own stuff on hold. And living alone because he doesn't want my type of dog would be bad for us.

They are mongrels on tiny wheels. :giggle One parent was probably a c.o.r.gi. *autocrrect is finicky* or doxie. Other than that, black, shaggy, and sweet sums them up. Stocky. C.o.r.g.I. grins and floppy ears. Maybe spaniel x c.o.r.g.I?

As I said, I've seen separation of an adult pair go fine, and seen it be unlivable. This dog seems to have the same general personality of the one that handled losing her sister without batting an eye. But, each is an individual so it's all conjecture. *shrug*

[Johns_Gal]

Brief update: talked to a guy at the shelter and he thoguht, then told me to contact the foster coordinator. Huge shelter, they had her listed as a seven month old puppy so the pregnancy is a surprise to them.

We may be able to hedge it so that I "foster" her until the pups are weaned. He seemed to get it... I don't mind an early spay, but a heavily gravid one I would prefer to avoid.

So, I will talk to the coordinator in the morning and see what we can finagle. :) We shall see.

[Sonata]

Sounds promising!

[Macky]

It's great that you found someone willing to work with you! :tu

[Annainprogress]

:pray4 that if she is the dog for you it all works out