Easy to love, difficult to discipline - 7 week challenge coming up!

[tempus vernum]

I am going to do a 7 week challenge if anyone is interested :mrgreen

I have done one before and it always helps so much to get refreshed :)


We will start June 21st

[The Tickle Momster]

I'm in! Did it with you last time. In fact, I thought someone had resurrected the old thread when I saw the title. :giggle Need to do it again. :bag

[tempus vernum]

I'm in! Did it with you last time. In fact, I thought someone had resurrected the old thread when I saw the title. :giggle Need to do it again. :bag

:hug I was thinking I need to do it once a year to keep it fresh :giggle :hug

[WildOlive]

I'd like to, but I need a little time to procure the book, so 21st would be better for me, but I can catch up.

[Sihaya48]

I have never made it through the whole thing on my own and have wanted to for the past oh, 2.5 years :bag I could really use the accountability and am pretty flexible on start dates.

[sweetpeasmommy]

In.

[MamaMansa]

:raise :jump

[BearyBlessed]

I'd like to, but I need a little time to procure the book, so 21st would be better for me, but I can catch up.

Same here. :yes

[tiffany]

don't have the book, but very interested in it - I'm swamped with reading I HAVE to do right now :( but hoping I can learn from you and it will make my own experience that much better when I get there.

[BriansLovie]

Definitely am in... I am rereading it right now. So many things make sense in that book.

[Calliope]

So in.

[fordboys]

I would love to do it. I am a new mama again and it would be a great refresher for my relationship with my older two.

[Castle On A Cloud]

I think i would be interested:) Can you tell me what it would be like? I have never read the book? What exactly is the *challenge?*

[bostonsmama]

I soo want to be in. :tu

[TraceMama]

I'm in :yes :tu

[Prism]

Hey this book is actually at my library! Ill grab it next week, and particapate! :D

[jblairosu]

Would this help with a mommy who thinks she's going crazy with a 3 year old and a newborn?!? :crazy If so, I'm in!

[Waterlogged]

Is it appropriate for toddlers (ie 14mos)??

[homesteadmama]

:rockon

I'm in!!

[La Loba]

June 21st please!! I'm in :D :yes :yes :yes

[nanookmama]

What is the seven week challenge? And what book are you using?

[Ellen]

:raise

[BriansLovie]

Would this help with a mommy who thinks she's going crazy with a 3 year old and a newborn?!? :crazy If so, I'm in!


The book has a list of techniques to help the parent maintain self control. Because you cannot discipline your children unless you have self control first. Discipline yourself before you can discipline your child. She talks about the powers for self control:

Power of:

Perception: No one can make you angry without your permission.
Attention: What you focus on, you get more of.
Free Will: The only person you can make change is yourself.
Unity: Focus on connecting instead of trying to be special.
Love: See the best in one another.
Acceptance: This moment is as it is.
Intention: Conflict is an opportunity to teach.


And of course there is more information in the book! She uses lots of examples on how to handle situations. I have found that when in a situation that I'm about to lose control, to think on these, and it helps calm me down. Also, she says not to try to avoid conflict, because it is a time to teach new skills, instead of just trying to hush the child up.

[Havilah]

I'm so here. We need a summer tune-up for sure!

[happyhippimama]

i'm in.

[tempus vernum]

Yay - so glad people are interested :heart

I will post either a weekly challenge and reading assignment -- maybe daily -- haven't decided yet. Then we will discuss it here.

That's it.

I personally am going to read it before hand because I think the challenge is done best after reading the whole book BUT you could read along with us and start the book when the challenge starts :)

We will start June 21st :grin

[SuperMama]

Me too! :yes

[tempus vernum]

Is it appropriate for toddlers (ie 14mos)??
As BriansLovie said, this book is about developing self control so that you can teach your children self control. It will be great for YOU but many of the techniques do not apply to a 14mo. I am babysitting a 14 month old right now and the only "discipline" I do is redirection ;)

What is the seven week challenge? And what book are you using? Sorry. . . easy to love, difficult to discipline by Becky Baily is the book. At the end of the book is a 7 week challenge to implement the techniques she uses!

If you search this forum using my name and ETLDTD, you can find the old challenge - I tend to think it was 2 years ago. As I said, for me, I need a tune up and refresher regularly. . . . :yes

[Leen]

I'm in! I borrowed the book from a friend a few months ago and haven't finished it yet, but I think I need it!

[marigold]

I just finished reading the book a couple months ago and would love some friendly reminders to help me through the challenge so... I'm in too.

[Punkie]

I'm in too! I've never read the book, but I just requested it from the library. :)

[Castle On A Cloud]

Cool the library in the next town over has the book holding for me:)

[Pearl In Oyster]

I'm in!

[CakeLady]

I need to do it. :O

[joyinthejourney]

I need a good summer read! Hmmm...that "unity-focus on connecting, instead of on making it special" intrigues me!

[mommylove]

I'm in.

[Two Little Birds]

Book is on hold at library. I'll jump in and read the book when it is availble.

[FebFaith]

I'll try to jump in when I can.

[Charlie U]

I'll give it a whirl. :)

[mommylobster]

I think I would really like to be apart of this but I have some questions. What age is the challenge best for? I have a 4 year old, have any of you tried it or plan to try it with that age? When I googled the book I found two different versions, one newer then the other. Do they both have the challenge?

[homesteadmama]

I'm going to do it with my three year old. I think it's appropriate. :-)

[MamaMansa]

I think I would really like to be apart of this but I have some questions. What age is the challenge best for? I have a 4 year old, have any of you tried it or plan to try it with that age? When I googled the book I found two different versions, one newer then the other. Do they both have the challenge?

It's definitely appropriate for age 4. :yes When I first went through the book during the last GCM challenge, my youngest DD was either 3, or just turning 4.

I'm not sure about the edition question though.....I have the newest one.

[Vicki_T]

This book will help me keep self-control? I'm in :yes

[tempus vernum]

I think I would really like to be apart of this but I have some questions. What age is the challenge best for? I have a 4 year old, have any of you tried it or plan to try it with that age? When I googled the book I found two different versions, one newer then the other. Do they both have the challenge?

This challenge is for YOU -- while it will help you parent children of all ages, it is about changing yourself first! :yes It's very empowering and for parents of babies and parents to teenagers and parents of adults. Honestly, the thought occurred to me it should be for people who aren't parents too. . . . they need self control as well :shifty

It's definitely appropriate for age 4. :yes When I first went through the book during the last GCM challenge, my youngest DD was either 3, or just turning 4.

I'm not sure about the edition question though.....I have the newest one.
I don't know about the edition either. My copy is downstairs. I'll see which I have later ;)

This book will help me keep self-control? I'm in :yes

YES, exactly. . . for me, the point of the challenge is to change how I see myself, my children and everything around me!!!!!!!!!

[Sihaya48]

This challenge is for YOU -- while it will help you parent children of all ages, it is about changing yourself first! :yes It's very empowering and for parents of babies and parents to teenagers and parents of adults. Honestly, the thought occurred to me it should be for people who aren't parents too. . . . they need self control as well :shifty
:yes I first read this book as a newly-married childless nanny of a 4yo and 6yo. It was revolutionary in helping me deal with the kids I watched and I frequently got compliments on how I interacted with them BUT it was also a huge help in my own personal attitude (it completely changed my mindset while driving and waiting in lines) and in interactions with my husband and other family members. And that's with me never even getting through the whole 7-week challenge!

[~yogamom~]

I'm in. We will be at my in-laws from June 20 for 4 weeks, so it will be good to have some (Self-)discipline reminders/pointers/support.

[hopeforchange]

if i can get the book and read before the 21st, i'm in. i definitely need this. :yes

[mommylove]

I already said I'm in, but could someone explain the challenge?

Do we read the whole book before the 21st, then work on 1 skill per week, or do we read the book a week at a time, focusing on that skill for the week? Does my question make sense? It makes sense in my head, but not on paper.

[MamaMansa]

I already said I'm in, but could someone explain the challenge?

Do we read the whole book before the 21st, then work on 1 skill per week, or do we read the book a week at a time, focusing on that skill for the week? Does my question make sense? It makes sense in my head, but not on paper.

You could do it either way. The first time we did this, I read the chapters each week during the challenge. This time, I may try to read the whole book before the 21st so that I can concentrate just on the challenge part of it. The benefit to reading ahead is that your mind isn't swirling with all the new information while you are trying to implement it. :heart All to say, either way works!

[tempus vernum]

You could do it either way. The first time we did this, I read the chapters each week during the challenge. This time, I may try to read the whole book before the 21st so that I can concentrate just on the challenge part of it. The benefit to reading ahead is that your mind isn't swirling with all the new information while you are trying to implement it. :heart All to say, either way works!

:yes and at the end of the book there is a 7 week challenge so you can focus on these things - there are questions and ideas to implement and ways to do so. . .

I haven't decided if I am reading ahead or not. Honestly, I started reading it yesterday and thought "sheesh. . . . I know so much of this. . . how can I need to do it again?" :shifty because I know where she is going before she goes there having read this book about 4 times in the past 8 years :O I guess I am a slow learner because I tend to fall back into bad habits during stressful times :blush

[Gentle Journey]

I'm in:yes

[Codi]

Me! Gotta buy the book now. :mrgreen

[BearyBlessed]

I picked mine up from the library yesterday. Just reading the first few pages I was ready to just weep with relief. It is exactly the book I need right now. :yes
(There are a couple others that I think are pretty important to get through now too, but this definitely takes priority.)

[Mama Rophe]

I'm so in. :thumbsup

[GranolanRainbows]

I'm there! I just lost my cool with Little D at least three times tonight. I need a tune up bad!

[Charlie U]

My copy arrived today. I need to finish up the two fiction books I'm reading so I can delve into this one without thinking of the others. :shifty

[mamahammer]

I'm in, though I'll be sporadic for a couple of weeks while we're on mission trips. I just started the first chapter :)

[mamacanuck]

The book has a list of techniques to help the parent maintain self control. Because you cannot discipline your children unless you have self control first. Discipline yourself before you can discipline your child. She talks about the powers for self control:

Power of:

Perception: No one can make you angry without your permission.
Attention: What you focus on, you get more of.
Free Will: The only person you can make change is yourself.
Unity: Focus on connecting instead of trying to be special.
Love: See the best in one another.
Acceptance: This moment is as it is.
Intention: Conflict is an opportunity to teach.


And of course there is more information in the book! She uses lots of examples on how to handle situations. I have found that when in a situation that I'm about to lose control, to think on these, and it helps calm me down. Also, she says not to try to avoid conflict, because it is a time to teach new skills, instead of just trying to hush the child up.

I'm in. this sounds like exactly what I need.

[Codi]

Will the first edition suffice? There is one at one of the local libraries but it is first edition. If I NEED the newest edition, Ill just HAVE to buy a copy. Man, I REALLY hate spending money on books.


:shifty

(sense the tone...there is NOTHING like a new book to add to my shelf.... Ahhhhh...)

[CapeTownMommy]

I'm pretty sure I have the book somewhere, but haven't read it. If I can dig it up, I'm definitely in - I don't want to buy another copy and the library doesn't carry it.

[KarenBoo]

I'm in!

[tempus vernum]

Will the first edition suffice? There is one at one of the local libraries but it is first edition. If I NEED the newest edition, Ill just HAVE to buy a copy. Man, I REALLY hate spending money on books.


:shifty

(sense the tone...there is NOTHING like a new book to add to my shelf.... Ahhhhh...)

:roll Yeah, except my dh is going to lodge a protest. I *thought* the wall of built in shelves would be enough but it's not. . . we are looking like we need another book shelf to add to our many others in addition to the built ins :giggle

I am sure the first edition is fine - I looked at my book for edition a few days ago and I am fairly sure I have the first edition but now I forgot :shifty

[bostonsmama]

my book came yesterday! :woohoo

[The Tickle Momster]

:roll Yeah, except my dh is going to lodge a protest. I *thought* the wall of built in shelves would be enough but it's not. . . we are looking like we need another book shelf to add to our many others in addition to the built ins :giggle

I am sure the first edition is fine - I looked at my book for edition a few days ago and I am fairly sure I have the first edition but now I forgot :shifty
I thought the same thing when my custom wall of bookshelves was installed. Fifty board feet of adjustable shelves should be enough, right? NOT! :grin

[backtobasicsmum]

I'm in! :heart

[Codi]

Ok! Ill get mine from the Library! :mrgreen

[BearyBlessed]

Mine is a first edition.
And no, I don't think you can ever have to much shelving! :no

[WildOlive]

Someday I want an entire room that I call the Library. With a British accent, of course.

A girl can dream.

[CapeTownMommy]

Sigh. I can't find my book. I have it, but our books are in total disarray, piles piles EVERYWHERE. I think I know what cupboard it's in, but that cupboard is packed stock-full of books, top to bottom, 3 deep. I've tried digging for it but no use. We're getting bookshelves made but probably not in time for me to do the challenge. :sigh

[Codi]

I got mine from the library today. :)

[MaybeGracie]

Picked up a copy from the library today - I'm in. :)

[amyhntr2]

Ooh I'll try to follow along if I can find a copy.

[phathui5]

I'm in!

I just reserved a copy online through the library's website, so hopefully they'll get it soon. I'm going to have to join in late with the discussion, as we'll be away at Mennonite camp (no Internet) June 20-25th.

[OrthoMama]

I'm in and so excited. I'm reading it now (seems like the same page over and over some days), and it is a lot to take in, so having a group and a break-down of topics or whatever will be great. Thanks!!

[Havilah]

I'm re-reading it while I hang my head in shame. :bag

How could I have forgotten so much! I'm constantly shooting myself in the foot. :(

Deep breath... tomorrow is a new day! Looking forward to the challenges. :heart

[hopeforchange]

we downloaded the book on dh's iPad and i'm reading it right now! :rockon

[mellymommy]

Got it from the library last week but haven't started it yet. I'll extend my loan with the library and join in.

[4thekids]

I'm in! I definitely need this.

[jennyjq8]

I would like to join in too. I haven't read this before, but it sounds like something that will really help me! I just started reading ScreamFree Parenting, which also focuses on parents controlling their own emotional reactions versus trying to control their kids.

This sounds great.

[MTmomma]

I am so in! I started this book about 9 months ago and still haven't finished. Part of me is so overwhelmed....this challenge will be perfect!

[Codi]

There are so many joining in on this! :woohoo Ive started skimming the book and it looks GREAT! Dh is going to read it with me!!! :rockon

[WildOlive]

I just started reading last night and I was so convicted. :cry The little, insidious ways that I've been shaming my kids without even realizing it :bheart. Thank you so much for this. If it hadn't been for the challenge I probably wouldn't have read this book.

[The Tickle Momster]

Renee, it'll be ok. Remember, when we know better, we do better. None of us are perfect at this mom thing. I promise. :hug We learn and move forward. :yes

[hopeforchange]

I just started reading last night and I was so convicted. :cry The little, insidious ways that I've been shaming my kids without even realizing it :bheart. Thank you so much for this. If it hadn't been for the challenge I probably wouldn't have read this book.

me too.

[Pearl In Oyster]

I'm taking it with me today to reread during breaks at Jury Duty

[tempus vernum]

I'm re-reading it while I hang my head in shame. :bag

How could I have forgotten so much! I'm constantly shooting myself in the foot. :(

Deep breath... tomorrow is a new day! Looking forward to the challenges. :heart

There are so many joining in on this! :woohoo Ive started skimming the book and it looks GREAT! Dh is going to read it with me!!! :rockon

I just started reading last night and I was so convicted. :cry The little, insidious ways that I've been shaming my kids without even realizing it :bheart. Thank you so much for this. If it hadn't been for the challenge I probably wouldn't have read this book.

Renee, it'll be ok. Remember, when we know better, we do better. None of us are perfect at this mom thing. I promise. :hug We learn and move forward. :yes

me too.

:grouphug

I have read this SO many times and so many times I have thought "why am I doing this?" but yet it's like I go back my childhood SO quickly when I am stressed. I have been a gentle mom since my eldest was 19 months and still I fall back into how I was parenting :(

I can't wait till Monday :tu

[Amy]

I'm so glad I saw this. I'm feeling like such a failure today. I have the book and am definitely in. Very much looking forward to going through it with you all.

[tempus vernum]

I'm so glad I saw this. I'm feeling like such a failure today. I have the book and am definitely in. Very much looking forward to going through it with you all.

You aren't a failure :no You are a work in process -- all of us are :hug

So glad you can join us.

REMINDER: We'll start this week - mon or tues. . . depending on my schedule. . . which is downstairs and I'm too lazy to see when I'll post the challenge ;)

[Codi]

So will we start by reading a certain section then discussing that? Or are there actual challenges that go along with the reading? Im not sure how this is gonna work but am excited!

[hopeforchange]

so i started reading the book last week and i already need to talk about what i read. :giggle so this is gonna be great...the only thing is that dh downloaded the book on his iPad and he has it at work all day every day. so i can only read it at night. :doh

[The Tickle Momster]

Codi, there are challenges at the end. You can read the whole book & then do the challenges or read the appropriate chapter along with the challenge. I'm only part way in so I'll probably end up doing the latter, even though I had hoped to do the former. :doh

[jennyjq8]

Still need to get this...maybe I'll see how much it is on Kindle, then I can read it on my iphone and I won't have to wait for it.

[KarenBoo]

Still need to get this...maybe I'll see how much it is on Kindle, then I can read it on my iphone and I won't have to wait for it.

Sorry my question is way OT, but you can download Kindle books to your iphone?!:jawdrop I'm such a techno-dweeb! :doh Can you tell me if and how I can really do this? Thanks! :heart

[jennyjq8]

Hi, yes, you can get a free Kindle app for your iphone. There are even some free books you can download (mostly old classics, but I like those), and many books have a free sample (usually the intro to the book). The books are a little cheaper than print books, and you can read whenever you have a chance since it's on your phone. Search for Kindle in the App Store.

[Codi]

:cup

[tempus vernum]

Week one has been posted :grin

http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/community/showthread.php?p=3157333#post3157333

[amyhntr2]

Sorry my question is way OT, but you can download Kindle books to your iphone?!:jawdrop I'm such a techno-dweeb! :doh Can you tell me if and how I can really do this? Thanks! :heart

That was my reaction when I read that! Off to find this on my iPhone now!

[naturemama1]

So glad to find this thread! I really, really like this book and reread it once every couple of years. I came back to GCM to start peeking at the Large Families board but I'm thrilled to see this reminder to pick up the book again. :)

[ReedleBeetle]

Just found this thread...I am going to try and jump in late! I will read regardless.

[lalaithnil]

:raise OK if I jump in late? :)

[The Tickle Momster]

:raise OK if I jump in late? :)
:yes