Chore Charts?

[tnaallen]

Ok - I think I finally landed on this being the board ot post this on. lol

Does anyone use chore charts and how do you use them? What do they look like, and what ages do you start with and with what types of chroes? :phew

My oldest is only 4yrs old, but since i feel like I am picking up toys all day long, I wanted to start something like a chore chart at least just for thigns like that. SOmethign simple, but that is more of a checklist way of keeping track of what she needs to do. Otherwise, I find that I cant ever pick the right time to ask her to pick them up, and she does the rush job whch means toys just thrown to places along the sides of the room (couch, under tv, etc..) so that the room is "clean" and the toys are "picked up". So then I have to remind her that they need to go to their proper places. Mind you, i don't recall her ever complaining about cleaning up. I just think it would help if she knew when, so I don't have to nag, or ask at wrong times (like remembering that too much time has passed again and then ask right in the middle of play before I forget. Or after I already sent her out to play and she's right in the middle of something. :doh )

When is a good time? Our bedtime routine/evening times, are so rushed that I just can't imagine trying to fit that in. She doesn't nap, and even with the younger (21 months) dd napping, they are both down for the night around 8p. So when daddy gets home in the evening, it's play a little, eat, baths and bed. And by actual bedtime, we can have some good meltdowns since they are both very tired. My oldest in particular gets mroe aggressive and non-cooperative from the late afternoons on because of the non-napping thing. It's not really an issue since I've learned to avoid certain things that would set her off (like doing our activities and errands in teh first half of the day, and not asking as much from her then as I would earlier in the day). But when does the clean up happen? Or what other chores can a 4 year old do or help with? She likes helping me with the dishwasher, cooking, and sometimes laundr. But you know how that goes...everything goes slower and I can get impatient. :blush But I'd like to make a way to include her and I think if I have something laid out it would help "me" to prepare myself each day for that time being "Slower" and a learning/bonding time. :)

enough rambling. I'd love to hear what other do. :popcorn

[tempus vernum]

We start chores right away - at 2.5 my dd helps with the dishwasher, puts away laundry, helps me make my bed, picks up toys, helps clean the bathroom, helps dust, helps stir things, and clears her plate (although we've added assistance as we use almost all glass and she started tossing plates in the sink when she could reach :doh). I think that's about all she does but she is always with us while we do the other stuff so she "helps"

I read a great chart in Positive Discipline A to Z about all of this :tu They have an age appropriate suggestion list and they also have lots of creative ideas for chores - we've done some of them and they've worked. We are constantly changing our chore approach :D

RIght now, My kids have chore charts :) They are almost 8 and 6. 2.5 yo doesn't have one -- she's too little. They put a sticker or smiley face on each thing they have done - they are totally responsible for putting it up there if they want "credit" for it.

We have done about everything at different times - a chore chart just for checking off, a chore chart w/no money just stickers, and a chore chart with incentives (money). There are a lot of opions about sticker charts, chore charts, incentives attached, etc I won't go into why we've done what we've done but usually during training times or times of disequillibrium we attach $$ to chores - we are currently paying one nickle per chore LOL and it's working tremendously well. This came because the kids REALLY wanted an allowance but I was hesitant to give them one. Unfortunately, my dh has been out of work and they won't get paid until we are caught up again ;)

Here is the poractical application in our house right now - again, this is a constantly changing ;)

A.M. chores -

right after breakfast, table is cleaned off, wiped and dishes put into dw (mom and kids together). They have to help clear 2.5yo's dishes and get everything off the table, help wipe. I usually load dishwasher while they are doing this.

UPstairs to dress, make bed, straighten room and possibly do "extra chores" like empty garbage, put away laundry, help dust mop floors or dust

straight to hygene -- they need to do hygene and put away supplies (brush, toner, face soap, toothbrush, paste) -- kind of a chore/kind of not but we make it a chore cuz they are loving their charts

Lunch
right after lunch, table is cleaned off, wiped and dishes put into dw (mom and kids together). IF done, get a sticker or smiley

Dinner -- after washing hands, they set the table
After dinner table is cleaned off, wiped and dishes put into dw (mom and kids together).
check dog, check hamster

Picking up toys happens periodically as needed.
empty dishwasher when its done running


here is their current chore list

Children – daily
clear table breakfast
clear table lunch
clear table dinner
set table dinner
room & make bed
empty dishwasher
pick up toys
feed and water dog
check hamster water/food supply

Children - weekly
laundry, empty upstairs garbages, help mama clean bathroom, clean hamster cage and refresh food/water dust upstairs, dust downstairs, help dust mop upstairs, fold socks, towels, **They only do the chores in italics EVERY week -- the others happen as I have time to have helpers or desire for help.

The newest thing is that the oldest are starting to do meals - 3 meals a week (breakfast lunch and dinner) with my assistance. They choose the meals and then we do them together - I am going to work my way out of helping :). Although dd1 (almost 8) can make mac n cheese, french toast, soup, sandwiches, and other easy things already. This has started naturally and they are expressing interest in picking and preparing meals so we are making it a bit more formal to avoid fights about it :giggle.

[WI Mama05]

:giggle I was just coming to post about this very thing! Thanks for the insight! I'm going to get on a chore chart for Rachel right away! :rockon

This might sound really dumb, but what do you do if your child refuses to do something? I am getting SO tired of Rachel just not listening or not caring, so what's the natural consequence for her not clearing her dishes or laying on the floor in a hump instead of helping pick up toys?

[tempus vernum]

That is why we use chore chartsduring times of disequillibrium and during times that I am teaching them new chores - the natural consequences is that they don't get to smiley face it - so they lose a nickle. At 8 and 6, a nickle is a lot of money apparently :giggle One other thing, if they don't have a positive attitude about it, they don't get the nickle either but still must complete it. See, we also use "as soon as". For example, the kids really wanted outside first thing today and I told them As soon as breakfast, morning routine and chores are done. So, if they were complaining about their beds, I would have let them know I'd be helping them. Then I'd help them do it and they wouldn't have gotten a smiley. But they'd still have to complete it before going outside.

Honestly, chores are so much a part of our lives that when we are consistent in the routine it's not an issue BUT rome was NOT built in a day. It took us months of CONSISTENCY to get to this point. Then when we have a lag, I move back in SLOWLY. ANd start with their personal responsibilities vs family things. So they'd be responsible for cleaning up after themselves when we get back in the routine and then they move into helping with family chores like cooking, bathrooms, kitchen, etc. Our rule is that someone has to master a chore before adding another one. Right now, cooking is our focus so no other new things will be added.

BUt that crazy nickle is really helping. DH and I don't agree on chores. I feel they should get the money because they are a part of the fmaily and they should do their chores cuz they are a part of the family :). Dh feels they should work for their allowance. So this is our compromise. I think they are getting a "base" and the chores just add money to their base if that makes sense :) We haven't actually fully figured out the money thing because dh has been off work for 7 weeks. Well, he has kind of been back to work but working only part time at the moment still. But I am thinking they'll get a $1 per week and then the chores add money to their $1. Savana will just get a few coins each time we pay the kids since she's only 2.5

[WI Mama05]

I basically just made one up that has clearing her dishes, picking up toys a few times a day, helping clean up from crafts and cleaning her bedroom/putting clothes away on it. She's 4.5 and really can do these things.....if she wants to :shifty. We've been having problems with the getting her to "want" to part and my DH is resorting to threats and the like :no. Stickers might be just enough for her, if not, maybe I'll move on to a penny for each sticker :giggle.

That was the other part, she wants to go out and play (and it's BEAUTIFUL here today) but she won't pick up her toys OR get dressed :scratch. She needs some motivation and I haven't figured it out. My "helping" her pretty much turns into her laying on the floor saying she's cleaning while I do the actual work. No more!

Thanks for the help!

[NayneeNoo]

A girlfriend of mine posted about how she does hers on her blog and I'm totally stealing this idea. LOL. I just haven't done it yet, so I'm going to show you hers. Our girls are just under 4.
http://gohnfamily.blogspot.com/2008/04/works-for-me-wednesday-chores.html

[tnaallen]

Somnoe on my homeschooling board doesn't rewards or do incentives, but instead she has them have an extra chore the next day (I think that was her who said that). Anyhow, It was related to what happened that day. Her son is 10yr old an dafter hving all day to put away clean clothes, never did and ended up putting them on the floor with the dirty clothes. So the "extra" chore was he had to do 2 loads of laundry (or maybe just helped) the next day... his dirty clothes AND now his clean clothes that got mixed in with the dirty ones. So more of a natural consequence for not dsoing the chore.

For us, it may not be a natural consequence, I don't know, but I give her a good amount of time with reminders to do the task at hadn (like picking up all the confetti she basically made from a craft), or she won't be allowed cutting next craft time. That or if it's toys, and I have to pick them up, then the toy is taken away for X amount of time. :shrug No idea if this is right or not, but it's worked. Also, mine is WAY outdoorsey so the whole needing to finish XYZ before going out works good here. ;)

be back after getting kiddos lunch to look at that blog chore chart. :) (btw - loving everythign so far ladies! Thanks! :rockon )

[WI Mama05]

I've been telling her that any toys *I* have to pick up at the end of the day get put away for a looooong time and it doesn't seem to phase her :shrug. She just leaves them out for me to get and I'm serious in saying I doubt she'll have much baby/doll things left in another week :shifty.

I wasn't sure about using outside as a natural consequence. I did this morning. I told her she could go out after she picked up her toys and got dressed, but not until. She chose not to, so she didn't go out. Now I feel guilty because days like this around here are so rare right now!

Oh well, consistency, right?

[tempus vernum]

Um. . . sorry, I forgot she's four. My idea of helping a four year old is having them sit and watch me :shifty

Totally not worth using "as soon as" or related consequences, cuz they could care less and it's way too difficult for me :shifty

:hugheart Having them watch you will work someday. Honest :hugheart

Nothing worked at 4 for us . . . nothing :hiding

I just kept doing it and talked about why we do it -- I wouldn't do consequences but required my kids do nothing but watch me while I "help" them :hiding