Where do I start?

[lmgeenw]

I live in fear of people stopping by unexpectedly and I am constantly stressed out by the messes in our house. It drives me insane to spend any amount of my precious time looking for things. We homeschool and are here most days and I will also soon have a crawling baby and I have to somehow make this house safe for her.
We live in a very small space with no storage expect for a storage unit that I just rented and a damp, moldy garage. We all sleep in one bedroom, we have a very small toy room, two tiny closets and one big closet and that is about it.
DH helps a little, but he procrastinates, like me, is not at all organized, and really just doesn't care what things look like. My older children (age 6 and 4) have chores, but it is a constant battle to get them to do them and sometimes it is easier to just do things myself.
The crazy thing is I feel like all I ever do is clean! I am really feeling the pressure to get organized lately and find easier ways to do things. I have been thinking about buying a book on organization. I haven't ever really been to this board before, but have been looking around and thought I would ask for help.
Any ideas where to start? Should I just hang out here more, do you have a book recommendation, or any suggestions? :shrug :/

[HummusDip]

Gosh I don't have any ideas, sounds like my life! I feel like I'm ALWAYS cleaning because I usually take a day "off" and the junk that accumulates in a day is AMAZING! I just need to learn to get into the habit of cleaning things as I use them. For instance, loading the dishwasher with dirty dishes rather than letting my sink pile up until I have enough for a load. I need to wipe down the countertops after every meal making. I need to clean my hot spots twice a day. :phew

Anyway, I just wanted to offer you support. :hug2

[tempus vernum]

baby steps. Start with the thing that would help the most and slowly control of it. Slowly as in 15 minute increments. or even 5 minutes at a time. At 6 and 4, IMO, the kids can start helping too. Although sometimes that is more difficult. If its more difficult that way, I might ask my dh to leave and take the kids with him so that I can declutter :giggle

Now is a great time of year to donate toys and clothes too :) We talk about helping the children that won't get toys for Christmas and don't have enough clothes. I have been shocked to see what my kids donate. Last year we "sponsored" a family with children a little younger than ours and my dd gave away some of her favorite toys :hearts It was a family we knew 2nd hand (friend of my sister's) who was tremendously brokoe and couldn't afford Christmas for her kids :cry :cry It worked really well and as I type this I think I want to do it again :hearts

Oops.. . hit post too quickly. I also start with what bothers my dh the most. What bothers me is my hot spots what bothers him is the dishes. If both of those things are done and you can walk through the house without tripping on something, we are both pretty good.

One quick tip I have that really helped me (although everyone is different) is to have room baskets. Basically a basket to toss everything in that's on the floor until it can be put away. It works well *if* you empty it :shifty

[rstump]

Flylady.com has great ideas to get started. Take those baby steps. A clean sink a few nights in a row can make all the difference in how you feel.

Then...declutter, declutter, declutter...that is the key. Many of our houses have SOOO much stuff that we are not really cleaning but just moving the stuff around (atleast that is what happens at my house)

[LadybugSam]

I i need to have an "emergency quick clean" it helps to have it written down in steps so i could get this done. I do this before company comes over, or after i've let the house slip a little and need to start up again :O

http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=57885889&blogID=301469407

I use motivated moms (http://www.motivatedmoms.com $8) to keep things up. It helps me a lot. I tried flylady but never stuck to it (even though i did learn a lot of things from it that have sort of stuck)

:hugheart

[milkmommy]

Our space we have s small two level "town home" down stairs is a split living dining area its small and doesn't hold much no coat closet or anything a tiny 1/4 bath (toliet and sink) is tucked under the stairs. Up stairs two rooms the master isn't really small but its oddly shapped and that makes it small DD room is small and we havea small bathroom we have one small closet in DD room a small walkin in ours and a small hall linen closet. We have no other storage and no garrage. Overall though my home stays clean but it took some practice to get that way...
1) super decluttering honestly if were not eactivly using it or a seriousluy used seasonal thing it goes.
2) ever thing has a home and place and everyone included in every room. DD has her toys in her room I do not allow her to spread her self all over the house that not to say thoug hshes can't have toys in other rooms but its everyones space not just hers.
we have a box for all her art supplies so if we get guests I or she can gather all her crayons markers paper sissors glue stickers ect strewn all over the table into one space and we can tuck it away fast easy and its there for her.
I keep wicker baskes on the top and bottom stairway landings anything that goes up or down gets tosses in the basket weather a shoe a toy a package of toliet paper whatever when full or each evening its everyones jon to look and put away the contents. Gain an easy way to controll clutter and avoid going up and down stairs all day. And the "honey/mommy have you seen" gets the always check the box response.
In the kichen dishes get cleaned as they are used even DD will clean rinse and put hers in the dish drainer. Afer all preps counters stove are wiped down trash disposed and floors swept honetly I can do this all in 2 mintues flat and really saves on work. Bathrooms are cleaned nightly DD gets a small container for her toys.
Overall the biggest thing was just waking it happen at first it felt like I was complaining ans cleaning and arguing with my family but really once I just decidied we were going to keep it clean (but not anal) it just fell into place. Now I like our small space I'm not sure what we will do with moore :giggle (though I admit I'd LOVE a coat closet we use a coat rack and i HATE it. and a yard would rock. :cool

Deanna

[blessedwithboys]

(((Leah)))) Don't feel bad- you've been to my (old) house! :giggle I think I'm going to try motivated moms this year. :yes

My grandma cleans this way- she takes baskets into a room and has a basket for each thing (i.e. toys, clothes, upstairs, paperwork). She sorts into the baskets and then takes each basket to it's "home". My failure with that method, however, is that I do the sorting part but that's often as far as it goes.

I was doing SO well before ds2 was born. :( My scatterbrain just can't handle the constant interruption that a baby brings, so I end up doing nothing.

My only saving grace right now is talking on the phone. I've made a "rule" for myself that I can only talk on the phone if I'm going to clean while I talk. Of course, that all falls apart as soon as ds needs to nurse, so it doesn't always work.

LMK when you find the answer ;)

[RealLifeMama]

Leah,
I feel the same way. The ages of my children are the same as yours except my baby is 10 months old, and is very mobile.

I live in fear of people dropping by, and it is rational because they really do drop by!

One thing that has helped me is to examine my behaviors to see why I have such a hard time. Just observe myself and how I do things, and then pick one area to work on change.
Being a "messie" or a "Sidetracked Home Executive" is hard because honestly, our brains do not function the same way as people that do not struggle like us. It is really hard. For instance, I have discovered that I really do not like lists. Most people seem to like lists and find lists helpful and enjoy crossing stuff off of their lists. I do not function well with lists and if I see a lot of things on a list, then I see the whole list at the same time and get confused. Also, if there are things marked off the list, I can't stand it, it hurts my brain, so I have to rewrite a list that only has the remaining items on it. :rolleyes Index cards would work better for me.

[mom2threegirls]

My grandma cleans this way- she takes baskets into a room and has a basket for each thing (i.e. toys, clothes, upstairs, paperwork). She sorts into the baskets and then takes each basket to it's "home". My failure with that method, however, is that I do the sorting part but that's often as far as it goes.


Wow, I LOVE that idea, Karen! :yes I'm having hard time lately in our new house- it's a thousand square feet bigger than our old house, AND 2 levels (versus the one level I was used to). I think the basket idea will work really great for me :yes. As long as I can get past the sorting part too ;) :hug2.

[Katydid]

A book I have found very helpful is "Confessions of an Organized Homemaker" by Deniece Schofield: http://www.amazon.com/Confessions-Organized-Homemaker-Secrets-Uncluttering/dp/1558703616

What also really helps me is having an accountability mentor (hi, Jodi! ;) )

:hug

[lmgeenw]

If its more difficult that way, I might ask my dh to leave and take the kids with him so that I can declutter :giggle


This is what I used to do but now I have a baby and if dh takes the kids somewhere, it is even more work for me because I have to entertain her. I think that is part of the reason I feel like I am in such a rut!


One quick tip I have that really helped me (although everyone is different) is to have room baskets. Basically a basket to toss everything in that's on the floor until it can be put away. It works well *if* you empty it :shifty

I love the basket idea. We have lots of baskets. I think I just need to change the way I use them.


(((Leah)))) Don't feel bad- you've been to my (old) house! :giggle I think I'm going to try motivated moms this year. :yes


Are you kidding? Your house was clean!!


One thing that has helped me is to examine my behaviors to see why I have such a hard time. Just observe myself and how I do things, and then pick one area to work on change.

This is what I feel like I need to do. I need to find simpler ways to do things and also do some major decluttering. I like the motivated moms thing. Confessions of an Organized Homemaker looks good too. I might look for it at the library.

Someone told me a couple months ago that I should just look at the mess in my house and change my thinking about it. I should think it is beautiful because my kids are happy and I have more important things to do than clean. I tried this for a couple weeks, but when I told my mom about it, she said, "Are you kidding, has ----- seeeen your house?" And my mom is not at all a clean or organized person. Then she went on to say how so and so has 3 kids and her house is always spotless... Well, so and so probably has a huge house and money to hire a maid! :cry :mad Anyway, now I feel even more sensitive about my house and it is also becoming a safety issue with the baby.

[greenjellysnakes]

:hug2

Come and join our messies challenge here (http://www.gentlechristianmothers.com/mb/index.php?topic=148503.0). I used to have better control over the mess in our house, until baby #2 came along. He is 4 months old, and I am just now starting to find the house underneath the mess again. I totally understand where you're coming from. So having said all that, the "December Messies Challenge" has changed my house in just a few short days. It's not overwhelming, there's a couple of regular daily things, and then a challenge and sometimes a bonus if you feel up to it and have time. Baby steps. You can do this!

[Titus2Momof4]

Sounds like it's time to declutter :shifty

Go through the toy room (and the other rooms....) and *seriously* declutter. Have four piles: Keep, Sell, Store, Trash.

Keep = stuff you want to keep in the room, for toy room, toys they play with on regular basis. other rooms, things you use on a regular basis.
Sell = stuff that is in good condition, but you don't really want/need anymore, and might make money off of it. Whatever *doesn't* sell, DO NOT bring back into the house. Instead, bag/box it up and drop it off at Goodwill/another thrift store.

Store = stuff you maybe haven't used in a long time, but would cost a lot to replace, AND you really do not want to part with.

Trash = well, that's self explanatory :shifty

Give yourself 2 days per room, and do this STRICTLY and religiously for each room in the house (maybe only 1 day for the bathroom(s) ) and then have your Garage Sale.

That should help you declutter, and ought to cut down on messes.

[ArmsOfLove]

I won't suggest my time on this journey is over or that I have arrived, but I understand my struggles and challenges from a different place now. I started with Flylady and got so much out of her. I could relate to her CHAOS as "can't have anyone over syndrome". I did her baby steps and was getting really on top of things until the twin pregnancy literally knocked me down and 3 years after their birth I'm finally feeling like my old self a bit--but in the last year and a half I've done MORE than I did in 5 years before they were born. I read, "Too much stuff: Decluttering your heart and home" and went :doh and :idea Then I read "Organizing from the inside out" and by implementing what I got from those books I've been digging through to the literal heart of the issues. My stumbling block was that I'm someone who actually gets organizing and for whom it comes easy, but I wasn't doing it from the inside out so was knocking down my own efforts for each *new* idea or technique that came down the turnpike. Once I stepped back and went, "That is organized and working for now, what else can I focus some attention on," I started getting stuff accomplished!

Decluttering is THE key imo. That and finding a way that you can organize your resources and information so that it is easily accessible. For example, I NEED to hold it in my hand and kinesthetically experience my calendar. Online resources, reminders that pop up, not the same :shrug So I stopped fighting it and created my home manual that I call "Watching Over the Ways of My Household." I also learned the concept of working backwards. I hate lists in general, but I love breaking things down into workable chunks and deciding in advance when the first step needs to be done so that I am ready to do the next step. It really stops the last minute panic episodes :tu

I'd start with asking what isn't working for you the most? Or do what she recommends in Organizing From the Inside Out which is to start with a hall closet and build on that ;) It's a bite sized chunk. And once it's organized do not add anything that doesn't belong there :)

[Titus2Momof4]

Wanted to add to my post.....


AFTER you have decluttered, you would be wise to go to the Dollar Tree (or somewhere cheap) and buy bins.....lots of them.......and organize EVERYTHING!!!! Stuff looks much neater when it's organized into bins, of all sizes ;)