ETA I mean in general can't stand parent/s or family/ies or friend/s treat...

[mybodymyself]

Baby/ies as an accessory in general not as human beings as they should be.

This has been really bothering since fri. Went back and forth on posting this on here since then. Trying my best to not post stuff like this, but stand this anymore.

Anyway, while I was doing my volunteer work, there was a mother whom came in with her 5 mo son because one of her sisters was having twins (c-section). She came in when I got there and then her sisters section wasn't until a couple or hr before I left for the day. Not sure if her sister's section was the time she came to the hospital or got pushed back because of an emergency. Of course their family/friends appeared pretty much into mainstream instead alternative like here.

Think thats it for now.

Thank you.

[purplerose]

I'm a little confused by your post? :scratch How are they treating babies as an accessory? :shrug Is it because she's having a c-section? :scratch I'm confused! :/

[Benjaminswife]

:think I don't understand :shrug

[mamaKristin]

:scratch I am also not understanding what the issue at hand is.

For the record, there are moms here who have had c-sections, scheduled or otherwise, who are still alternatively-minded. :)

[Mama Bird]

My question exactly. Is it because the sister brought her 5mo to the hospital all day or because the lady is having a c-section?

I would probably not bring a baby that young to the hospital, for that long. Depends on the temperament of the baby though. I just don't like having little ones in the hospital for too long.

Being faced with a possible c-section, I'm not sure how that would be an accessory. There are some truly valid medical reasons for c-sections.

Can you clarify for us, please? :shrug3

[Maggie]

I also get upset when people don't treat babies like the human beings that they are! :hug2 I'm not sure if it was the 5mo you were upset for, but I think it was actually a good thing the baby was with his/her mommy for those hours intead of being left with a sitter.:)

[GodChick]

:scratch

For the record, there are moms here who have had c-sections, scheduled or otherwise, who are still alternatively-minded.

like me. :raise :heart

i know it is hard, but it is also good to remember that sometimes when we see people at the hospital/store/street/wherever, we are often only seeing one small bit of what they are like. it's hard to assume you can't stand them or their lifestyles based on what you see just for a few moments.

for instance, one may see a bmom with a baby in a stroller, and assume she's not ap because she's not wearing her baby in a sling. but it could be that she does everything else ap, but she has a bad back so she uses a stroller instead of a sling.

or one may see a mother at the store buying a whole cart full of chips and soda and think she must just feed her kids junk. but it could be that she is having a party and the chips and soda are a big treat for her kids because they seldom get them.

see what i mean? it's hard to judge someone as a parent just by what you see for a few minutes. i try to assume most mothers are doing the best they can for their children. :heart

[milkmommy]

Clarification will be good. My Sil scheduled all her births and for her convience. She tend to like to hold them and be the "fun parent" but any actual parenting she can't be bothered with. Those poor babies get colds scrapped knees feeling hurt and all that and go right for the nanny. :cry
However just having a C cession along doesn't mean they dont care.

[mybodymyself]

Lara, benjaminswife, Kristin, Haley, Maggie, godchick, Deanna, and the others that will follow me,

Sorry, for been so vague before.


I also get upset when people don't treat babies like the human beings that they are! :hug2 I'm not sure if it was the 5mo you were upset for, but I think it was actually a good thing the baby was with his/her mommy for those hours intead of being left with a sitter.:)



:scratch

like me. :raise :heart

i know it is hard, but it is also good to remember that sometimes when we see people at the hospital/store/street/wherever, we are often only seeing one small bit of what they are like. it's hard to assume you can't stand them or their lifestyles based on what you see just for a few moments.

for instance, one may see a bmom with a baby in a stroller, and assume she's not ap because she's not wearing her baby in a sling. but it could be that she does everything else ap, but she has a bad back so she uses a stroller instead of a sling.

or one may see a mother at the store buying a whole cart full of chips and soda and think she must just feed her kids junk. but it could be that she is having a party and the chips and soda are a big treat for her kids because they seldom get them.

see what i mean? it's hard to judge someone as a parent just by what you see for a few minutes. i try to assume most mothers are doing the best they can for their children. :heart



Clarification will be good. My Sil scheduled all her births and for her convience. She tend to like to hold them and be the "fun parent" but any actual parenting she can't be bothered with. Those poor babies get colds scrapped knees feeling hurt and all that and go right for the nanny. :cry
However just having a C cession along doesn't mean they dont care.


Ditto with what Maggie, godchick, Deanna said here on this. Do understand where all of you are coming from on this, but it still annoys me.

Thank you.

[Maggie]

Jessica, :hug Did you think that the baby would be bored and uncomfortable being there that long? is that what you didn't like about the situation?

[mybodymyself]

Maggie,

Thank you for your latest response.


Did you think that the baby would be bored and uncomfortable being there that long? is that what you didn't like about the situation?


Exactly, he was fine pretty the whole time, but to me it made me uncomfortable seeing him that way. Don't worry he wasn't in his seat the whole time.

Thank you.

[Iarwain]

Many times attached babies are perfectly happy wherever they are as long as mama is there. In the past I have spent long periods of time up at the hospital with one of my babies. When my paternal grandmother was dying we spent many hours in the ICU waiting area with Princess who was 9 mos old at the time. She didn't mind much and when she got bored I walked her up and down the halls to keep her occupied. It was certainly less hard on her than being separated from me for that length of time. In fact, her presence was a big blessing to us all to remember the blessing of new life while we were saying goodbye to a loved one. A mom can't just stop going about life because she has a baby. You just have to do your best to meet baby's needs and do what you have to do.

[milkmommy]

Well I'll give another POV. No lets assume that the baby wasn't just stuck in his carrier left in a cprner all day.. but was held fed ect but in the enviroment of the hospital. Well I'd say good for them, I think we can also go the other direction worrying so much about making envoroments soo kid "friendly" we forget to make our children babies part of our world. A sister haiving a C cession wather outta choice or need is still a time for family to be near. I think it can be a good thing to see family bringing there babies with them to share this family time even if its waiting around for news.

[mamaKristin]

Jessica,

I would really like to encourage you (and all of us here) to not be too quick to judge what another woman, another mother is doing. We don't always know why someone is doing what they are doing, or why. If my sister were having twins, and I had a 5 month old, I would probably be at the hospital too. Doesn't make my baby an accessory, but makes me the mom who is with my baby, and the sister supporting my sister.

[mybodymyself]

Many times attached babies are perfectly happy wherever they are as long as mama is there. In the past I have spent long periods of time up at the hospital with one of my babies. When my paternal grandmother was dying we spent many hours in the ICU waiting area with Princess who was 9 mos old at the time. She didn't mind much and when she got bored I walked her up and down the halls to keep her occupied. It was certainly less hard on her than being separated from me for that length of time. In fact, her presence was a big blessing to us all to remember the blessing of new life while we were saying goodbye to a loved one. A mom can't just stop going about life because she has a baby. You just have to do your best to meet baby's needs and do what you have to do.



Well I'll give another POV. No lets assume that the baby wasn't just stuck in his carrier left in a cprner all day.. but was held fed ect but in the enviroment of the hospital. Well I'd say good for them, I think we can also go the other direction worrying so much about making envoroments soo kid "friendly" we forget to make our children babies part of our world. A sister haiving a C cession wather outta choice or need is still a time for family to be near. I think it can be a good thing to see family bringing there babies with them to share this family time even if its waiting around for news.



Jessica,

I would really like to encourage you (and all of us here) to not be too quick to judge what another woman, another mother is doing. We don't always know why someone is doing what they are doing, or why. If my sister were having twins, and I had a 5 month old, I would probably be at the hospital too. Doesn't make my baby an accessory, but makes me the mom who is with my baby, and the sister supporting my sister.


Iarwin, Deanna, Kristin,

Thank you for your responses. WOW all this time I thought the opposite of what you posted in your responses.

[Mama Bird]

Wherever I go, my baby goes. I've even rocked my baby in a bucket carrier with my foot while I had a root canal. As long as it's a safe environment, my baby goes. :yes

[klpmommy]

a baby in a hospital for that long-- i would do :yes

a toddler/preschooler? doubtful unless necessary

the difference? baby until mobile is portable & just needs mommy. toddler/preschooler would get bored (mine would!!) and then it would be not only stressful for both of us but also unsanitary w/ all the germs.

it is hard when you are looking from the outside in, esp when you aren't a parent yet, to know what you *would* do in such a situation. i know i had lots of ideas & ideals prior to kids & many, many of them have changed.

:nak2

[mybodymyself]

a baby in a hospital for that long-- i would do :yes

a toddler/preschooler? doubtful unless necessary

the difference? baby until mobile is portable & just needs mommy. toddler/preschooler would get bored (mine would!!) and then it would be not only stressful for both of us but also unsanitary w/ all the germs.

it is hard when you are looking from the outside in, esp when you aren't a parent yet, to know what you *would* do in such a situation. i know i had lots of ideas & ideals prior to kids & many, many of them have changed.

:nak2


Kimberly,

Thank you for your response and again it really helped me as well.

[Maggie]

Iarwin, Deanna, Kristin,

Thank you for your responses. WOW all this time I thought the opposite of what you posted in your responses.



We're all still learning! :)

[mybodymyself]

We're all still learning! :)


Maggie,

Exactly, we never stop learning anyway.

Thank you.

[hey mommy]

Yep, we're all still learning. :) And I'm another 'where I go, my kid goes" person. I don't have a sitter very often. I've taken my son a gazillion places. Heck, at age 5 he was watching me have a trans-v*ginal u/s. He didn't have a choice and neither did I. That's just the way it had to be.