Sportsmanship

[mellymommy]

When do they learn sportsmanship? My ds (4.5yo) is on his first ever soccer "team", and I use the term team VERY loosely as it is really just 3 and 4 year old running around semi-chaotic-ly kicking balls toward two orange cones as the coach tries to impart his soccerly wisdom. Anyway, my ds--who has some mild sensory integration issues--literally cries and throws a fit when he does not get to be the one who kicks the ball into the goal EVERY time or if he doesn't get to wear the "other team" tank-top in practice or if he does not kick the ball just right to his passing partner. In all honesty, I am horrified and embarrassed by his behavior as all the other kids are having fun, laughing, and learning. I've been trying to team him that winning is not the MOST important thing in life--that is one of the main reasons that I did the triathlon, to show him that I still had fun and did my best even though I KNEW I would not win the race.

Am I expecting too much from him? Should I avoid team sports--he is VERY athletic? Any tips for teaching being a team?

[mamaKristin]

Teams at that age aren't really teams yet. It takes time and maturity to develop sportsmanship, and practice.

To be honest, I bet if you stepped back from being horrified by his behavior and watched the other kids a bit more closely, you would probably find he's pretty typical. ;) My son played soccer this year, and his 5-6 year old team always played while the 3-4 teams were playing on the next pitch. There was a meltdown from at least one team member each game day. The 5-6 team had less of them, but they still happened. Some children are more sensitive to not winning, and that is part of their personality, some take not getting their wishes in stride.

Perhaps practicing a bit at home with some soccer skills, while 'scripting' good reactions could help. Practicing kicking while also practicing reacting to not having the ball go where you want it to. That may help.

[mellymommy]

Perhaps practicing a bit at home with some soccer skills, while 'scripting' good reactions could help. Practicing kicking while also practicing reacting to not having the ball go where you want it to. That may help.




I don't know why I didn't think of this!!! I guess I was blinded by my guilt over being embarrassed by his behavior. :blush