What do you do when child won't take a nap?

[Dandelion]

She is 2 and I am very frustrated. She seriously needs a nap and so do I. And I am feeling as though she controls the day now...we can't go to my parents and anything that we do try to do will be a challenge with a napless 2 yr old.

[SamsMama]

She should definitely still be taking a nap at 2. I have a two and a half year old and he naps 2 and a half to three hours each afternoon. He has gone through nap strikes though, and I've just been persistent and he eventually resumed napping each time. Can you try a different time of day? I've noticed with Sam that it's harder to get him down if I wait to long and he's already overtired. We have a nap routine of cuddling in the rocker in his room with a snack, reading three books and then singing a couple of songs. When he lays down in his bed he usually tries many procrastinating measures and I always think of something fun to tell him we'll do when we all wake up (I tell him his baby sister and I are going to be napping too, even if we're not) and that we can't do it if he doesn't take his nap. There are days he gets out of bed and plays, talks in bed, etc., and if he does this for an hour I go back and get him up and he just goes to bed an hour earlier that night. On those days I usually go in twice to remind him to go to sleep. Once in awhile he just has that quiet hour in his room though. Hope this helps.

[Marsha]

I just go do something else, if it's not happening. Sometimes then she'll nap around four. Sometimes she never naps at all (and is surprisingly okay with it too) and she'll fall asleep around 6:30-7. Which is great ,cause that's when the 5 yo goes to bed.
She's been very iffy with the naps lately, I'd like them ideally to last until three! But she doesn't melt down much when she misses a nap, so I assume on those days she needed less sleep. :shrug

[doubleblessings]

What do you do at nap time? Have you tried a different routine/location? Do you lay down with her?

[Dandelion]

at nap time I usually just give her a drink and put her in bed...I used to lay down with her, but it seems now that since the baby must be with us too it ends up being more of a distraction than a help. She has been giving me a hard time since summer ended and we are not as busy, plus she was used to often falling asleep in the car during the summer. But most days she will eventually go to sleep in bed by herself - just not today and I am very frustrated. I guess I am mostly just being fearful (which is never a good parenting attribute :no2), I know how awful bedtime can be when she is overly tired. And I am also upset because I have to rearrange our plans if she is going to go to bed earlier than usual. I used to be much more laid back with my first child as far as naps go, but I find it harder now to be okay with disruptions to the "schedule" because I know that it means that things are more difficult or not possible for the other kids to do when someone is out of control tired.

[joyful mama]

I know eveyr 2 yo is differnt but mine *needs* a nap still. If she won't nurse down, cuddle down, than we go to the park, run around HARD then take the scenic route home. Works every time ;). If its a bad day and the nap was too small, we watch a movie.

ah, I just read your post. My 2 year old would never nap if I just gave her some milk and laid her down. I have to be there to get her down. I'd usualy find something quiet for the other one to do while I get her down, or we ALL lay in bed, sound machine on, door closed, lights dimmed, and snuggle. If all else fails, we take a drive until they are both out. If even then they won't nap than I extend the drive for a while so *I* can have a break.

[gentle_answer]

My 2 yo doesn't nap anymore becuase I can't lay with him and give him the attention that he needs because of our new baby. It is difficult right now but I know that it will take some time to adjust and then we will have a new routine. I try and look at the positive side of no nap. (You really have to stretch to come up with some stuff). Earlier bed time is nice.

[cornflower]

I'm not answering your question, and I hope you forgive me for that. :heart

Mine stopped napping when they weaned (at about 2.5yo). Without nursing there was no way for me to calm them enough for them to consistently go to sleep. It just meant that we had bedtime earlier. Later I did institute a "rest time," but there was no way I could make my 2yos stay in a room or lying down for rest time -- I had to reintroduce the concept of "rest time" when they got a little older and more cooperative.

( :giggle I think I just called a 3yo "more cooperative" by default. :haha :haha :haha That's hysterical.)

[mamaKristin]

you know the phrase about leading a horse to water? apply it to toddlers and napping. ;)

You can set up a great sleep routine (and having nap-strikes can be a great time to re-evaluate nap routines), and encourage sleep all you want...it just won't always happen. Like it's not happening *right now* with my just turned 3 year old. :/ I can't make her sleep, but I can prepare for the emotional meltdown I know will come at approximately 4:45pm, and be prepared to start bedtime slightly earlier than usual.

[Lady TS]

I don't think that a 2 yo HAS to take a nap. (it IS nice for mom, though :shifty).

My boys 'weaned' from taking a daily nap when the next baby was born--then I didn't have the ability to just sit with them/sing to them/nurse them down/whatever until they fell asleep, and they don't just stay in their rooms until they fall asleep. So :shrug

I just don't go anywhere I don't have to go in the afternoons. :shifty Which is a bummer sometimes, because about now I could really use a quick trip to the grocery store but it's so not worth the fighting dd to stay in the sling/cart/aisle and keeping the boys around me too. She did just nurse down (it's 4:08 now). But when she doesn't take a nap, she is a LOT easier to nurse down in the night and put to bed!(that's a positive!) And when she wakes up from this nap, she's probably going to be a total grump...so I'm not sure it's worth luring her to sleep like that. :shifty

I figure it's just a phase and we will be past it in due time...

That's probably not a lot of help, is it? ;)


ETA: My MIL is awed by the fact that my kids don't take regular naps now. She had to wean dh off of his naps when he went to kindergarden!

[ArmsOfLove]

My 2yo's sometimes nap and sometimes don't. Yes, they are more intense when they don't but :shrug You can't force someone to sleep. It does help that I've already taught them to listen to their cues and make myself available to nurse them to sleep. If I had a baby I'd set it up to already have them asleep or have that be their time in the swing/bouncy chair so that I could nurse them down.

[abbzchld]

My 2yo's sometimes nap and sometimes don't. Yes, they are more intense when they don't but :shrug You can't force someone to sleep.


Same here. Lately, I'm finding that if I lay down with her after reading, snuggling, etc...I fall asleep and she's off and running. :doh I just go with it. My mom says I was the same way and what goes around comes around. :no

[ServantofGod]

One thing I do sometimes when my DS won't nap is tell him it is reading time (or quiet time, or whatever) and I place a little basket of several board books in his bed with him. I tell him he can look at books a little while. This usually makes him fall asleep if he really does need a nap.

(This is after I've given him a drink and laid down with him for ten or so minutes, plus read him a couple of books.)

I don't know if that would help, but something like this might work. If not books, then small toy animals or cars or whatever can be played with quietly and right in front of them.

Oh, I also use a half-tablet of Calms Forte if he's really bouncing off the ceiling. I don't know if it helps or not, but since I usually get the desired result, I keep using it whenever he's wilded up! :giggle

[Amythestmama]

Like others have said, you can't make her sleep. Would she just play in her room for a set amount of time- say 1/2hr, or an hour? Dd doesn't always take a nap but @3pm nearly every day, I do send her to her room to 'play and if you get tired you can lay down.' It's not a punishment by any means. She enjoys playing in her room and will often ask if she can go to her room and play. She usually plays for 15min-1/2hr and then falls asleep. If she doesn't take a nap, yes, she is more whiny and weepy in the evening but after a bath and jammies and a story, I set her in daddy's chair with some books and we either turn on music or a video even and she will be fine and just fall asleep there. Personally, the alone time is wonderful for me. I am much calmer and more patient when I've had even 1/2hr with the children not constantly with me. :shifty

[Dandelion]

Thanks for all the great advice and support everyone! Since I our no-nap day Tuesday she has gone back to taking naps. She does REALLY need them. What I decided was to try laying down with her again because I really need a short nap many days as well :yawn. And that has worked, I fall asleep for 20-30 minutes and she finally falls asleep and stays asleep long enough for me to get a few things done and her to return to her normal sweet well rested self. And the baby has been cooperative.

[cornflower]

That's fantastic, mamacheetah! :rockon