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View Full Version : why oh why must he be so 2?


Beauty4Ashes
09-22-2007, 11:38 AM
I don't know what I am doing wrong. For example, we were at the beach today and ds2 was eyeing the public telephones. Dh gave him one to talk into and then hung it up for ds2. Ds2 wanted to do it himself and was mildly upset when dh hung up the phone for him. Dh didn't even give the phone back to ds2 and then help him to hang it up. Had I done the same thing, I would have experienced the major meltdown of the century. If I am in a hurry, I don't always have time to slow down and let ds2 re-do things for me, or rather, by himself. But then I have to pay for it later in the form of a meltdown. So am I wrong to not always let ds2 do everything by himself in the interest of time? How do you handle your le's independence? I do try to let ds2 do as much as he can by himself and only step in to help him if he asks for it. He's wearing me out. There was more than one time yesterday where I told him, your crying is really wearing me down; I cannot take much more of this. Putting him by himself in a separate room doesn't work--this is when I can no longer take the screaming and need for him to just let out those big emotions away from me for a while. He'll come chasing after me screaming all the more. :sigh HELP!!!

missym
09-24-2007, 09:29 AM
I have a very independent-minded 2 year old, too. DD2's favorite phrase is "MY do it!" She gets really angry if we intervene. We try to be accommodating, but sometimes we just have to help, or do it for her. I try to recognize and validate her feelings of frustration and disappointment, but if she needs to throw a tantrum then that's just the reality of it. I'll be interested to read what strategies others can suggest!

Freetobeme24
09-26-2007, 03:15 AM
:popcorn Because we experience this too, and I know what you mean :yes

Beauty4Ashes
09-26-2007, 05:37 AM
I'm setting a little bit firmer boundaries with Danny and while it's still early to say that it's working, I'm seeing not quite so many meltdowns. He still gets to be independent, but I don't have h*ck to pay if I forget and do something for him. I'm working on teaching him and his brother to not use that loud over the top voice in the house and how to speak politely when they want something. We shall see...