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View Full Version : over stimulated ****Help!!!!! Update in late post


ShiriChayim
09-11-2007, 12:22 PM
My 3yo was a high need baby, and is now a very spirited child. One of the issues we've always had is that he's gogogogo during the day, but he gets overstimulated in the evening and ends up running around and knocking into things and being out of control. Now, I definitely prefer this to the 3 hours crying jags he used to go on, but honestly, I don't know how to help him. We do have quiet time during the day. I just don't know how to help him.

He also gets overstimulated in a room with lots of other kids. It's too much and he starts acting out.

SouthPaw
09-11-2007, 12:25 PM
can you take him outside? do you mean early evening or late enough that it is dark?

mamaKristin
09-11-2007, 12:31 PM
any chance he has food intolerances/allergies?

Marsha
09-11-2007, 01:13 PM
Do you have a safe place for him to expend that energy? Like we have our couch, and beanbags and the trampoline and sometimes the recliner :jawdrop all in play during my sensory-seeker's "seeking" time.

And a second on food intolerance. We get that times ten if a whiff of dairy has made it in to the diet.

ShiriChayim
09-11-2007, 01:52 PM
HELP!!!!!!! Ok, part of the reason I posted and the issue that's brought this to a head is that last night we went to a group thing at the church last night and had some pretty serious issues. First of all they were drastically understaffed. There was one adult with about 3 young teen (13 and under) helpers, for over 20 preschoolers. I saw this and went into help. All the kids were in a room too small for that many, it was chaotic and overhwhelming. My son did well until the end, but he ended up doing a lot of knocking kids over, which is his thing, he just loses control. I dealt with Peyton all night and did not simply allow it, but the whole situation was just bad. The small groups minister was in there for just the very end, so of course he saw the bad part, as was his wife. There was an incident where he knocked over a little girl (about 1 year) who began to cry and just wanted to be held. She had been fussy all night long, so I recongnize that getting knocked over didn't help. But the wife was over talking to the 13yo girl who saw it and was like where is she hurt, did she bump her head, what's wrong, and I kept trying to say, I think she's more scared than hurt, but they both just ignored me while the girl told the wife a rather exaagerated view of the incident. The look on the wife's face while she looked at my son just made me want to slap her! Now I the small group minister has now called me to set up a meeting where we can talk about how the situation was dangerous last night. I'm sure he's had an earful from his wife. I'm hurting and scared and I don't know what to do. HELP!!!!!!

ShiriChayim
09-12-2007, 05:16 AM
so ummm, those that are talking about food sensitivities, I'm thinking about maybe trying an elimination diet, and starting with dairy? What kinds of substitutes do you use?

Marsha
09-12-2007, 06:17 AM
On the dairy thing, starting out I would just eliminate it, and eat different types of foods (ie., no cold cereal, etc with milk)because it takes awhile before substittues are actually acceptable or palatable if you know what I mean.

Also, on the hyper, wound up thing. I had one. I stilll have issues with it with her. we have just now, barely, dipped our toe into evening activities. For a long time (and still) we did nothing in the evening unless one parent went and one parent stayed home with her.
An over-tired, over-stimulated 3 year old cannot be expected IMO to play by the rules of polite society especially in crowded places.
Even at home, my 5 yo required direct supervision and lots of guided directed jumping interesperesed with quiet reading times and an earlu bedtime. (6:30-7:00) That was a sacrifice we were able to make for our dd largely because she was the oldest and more or less gets to set the tone for the family. It may not work for yours.

ShiriChayim
09-12-2007, 06:29 AM
I'm thinking it may be something we need to do for now. It's hard because of my husband's schedule if we're going to do anything, it must be in the evening. He does well at a babysitters, but I think evening activities at church may need to be out. I just don't think the church is set up properly, even though they just spent all this money on a new children's wing. The attitude tends to be to minister to the adults, and just have the children taken care of so they can do that, so I don't think there's enough structure to these childcare options. It's definitely something that needs help. We have such a large church, with so many children, yet so little focus on actually training them.

Marsha
09-12-2007, 07:06 AM
We had to make saturday family day and daddy puts her to bed so he gets some time with her. We gave up evening activities, including Walmart shopping trips LOL for a long time. We have just started going to choir on Wed night, 6:30-7:30 and she ends up too tired most evenings, so we've gone 2 out of 4 times so far LOL. And she's 5.
I figured it wasn't fair to her to take her places when I KNEW she wasn't going to succeed. She needs to be in bed early for all of our sanities. LOL

abbiroads
09-12-2007, 07:11 AM
we rarely do evening activities. Joey just can't control himself. Our family socializing is limited mostly to church.

ShiriChayim
09-13-2007, 07:07 AM
I'm really beginning to rethink my stance on Peyton and church activities. Actually I just realized what's been bugging me so much anyway, there are NO child/adult mixed church activities. NONE. The only kids activities(besides youth group) are Sunday School. Anyway, I've pretty much decided to nix the Peyton out in the evening if he's not with us or his grandparents.

abbiroads
09-13-2007, 07:10 AM
I am so glad you are able to take another look at what is happening. He will mature and be able to handle evenings out eventually :hug