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Titus2Momof4
08-24-2006, 08:11 PM
As much as this has been a struggle to employ PD and not spank, I have really rec'd some encouragement from the kids the past 2 days. A few times, they would come up to me, climb on my lap (which they never really did before), or just come up to me and hug me (again, something they never really did) and say "You're the best mommy in the world!" or "I love you sooooo much!" :cry Of course it isn't that they haven't been *disciplined* lately...but it's been positive discipline, and I am amazed at how they are reacting towards me. Dh and I have been cuddling a lot, both in non-confrontational times and during meltdowns (although mostly me during meltdowns because he feels like he doesn't know what to do, but he is really *seeing* how it has been working). I just feel so "right" with this. Like I don't have this feeling in the back of my mind that I'm damaging my relationship w/the kids (as I have wondered in the past). Even though dh was the one who initially said he didn't want to spank anymore, during meltdowns he can't help but feel like there should be some punishment, and that I'm rewarding the meltdown. I have been giving a sort of play-by-play pointing out to him that even though I am cuddling/rocking a child on my lap (during a meltdown) that I am *not* giving in to what it was the child wanted, therefore not 'rewarding' the meltdown. He :yes and :think

But anyway.... the real encouragement has been in the openness the kids have been sharing of their love for mommy in just the past 2 days, which they had never really done before. We just were not 'touchy feely, lovey dovey', but I can see that they really crave that and enjoy it. :heart

4Cygnets
08-24-2006, 08:14 PM
How wonderful!!! :woohoo :ptl

Thanks for sharing!! :highfive

euromom
08-24-2006, 08:20 PM
What a great testimony! How encouraging! :praise

ArmsOfLove
08-24-2006, 09:15 PM
you're definately on a great path :tu

raisa
08-25-2006, 07:34 AM
during meltdowns he can't help but feel like there should be some punishment, and that I'm rewarding the meltdown.

:yes Doesn't it feel great to break free of this? What finally clicked with me is that, comfort and affection aren't rewards. I love my family unconditionally. Hugs and kisses are FREE in my house. No one has to earn them. What a relief for all of us.

mommyof3dds
08-25-2006, 07:40 AM
:ptl How wonderful! Keep up the good work. :tu :highfive

Atarah
08-25-2006, 10:49 AM
:happytears :happytears :happytears

How exciting!

UltraMother
08-25-2006, 01:34 PM
Doesn't it feel great to break free of this? What finally clicked with me is that, comfort and affection aren't rewards. I love my family unconditionally. Hugs and kisses are FREE in my house. No one has to earn them. What a relief for all of us.

YES YES YES YES YES YES

Radosny Matka
08-26-2006, 08:23 PM
:dance :highfive Fantastic!

Teacher Mom
08-26-2006, 08:32 PM
:ptl

:hugs

katiekind
08-26-2006, 09:25 PM
How encouraging!