I want to stop yelling...

[ozmummy]

I have realised it has gotten worse over the last year...a difficult pregnancy and crazy hormones, and now it's a habit :blush

And I have loaned my copy of "easy to love" to a friend...

Didn't Joanne or Jeri have a blog entry about their journey of stopping yelling?

[Cindy]

:popcorn

[Sandollar]

:popcorn oh I need help with this too, big time :blush

[holmgirl]

same here :cry

[Marsha]

me too!

[wombmate3]

I have been yelling more than usual too lately! :popcorn

[mama of two]

At least knowing that I'm not the only one having this struggle is comforting, however, I still want some guidance on how to stop. I don't do it often (at least not compared to my parents) but when I get tired or my patience is wearing thin it does happen.

[Ca_mommy]

I TOTALLY understand where you are coming from! I was about to post the same thing! I find my voice just getting louder and louder. DD is going through some REALLY rough times right now and absolutely HATES it when I ask her to stop or if I am coming near her to redirect her. She screams "NO!" at me and it just makes me wonder, "Is she getting that from me, or is it her 'Terrible Two-ness coming out of her?"

Oh... I have cried a few times this week about this same thing!! At least we have this board to come to! :hugheart

[KayandLydisMom]

:popcorn

[ozmummy]

Wow

I just get this image of these gentle mums out there who are so peaceful and gentle but firm, and in control of their negative emotions :lol
Nice to know it's not just me...

cmon everyone
:grouphug

[Cindy]

Actually I have a problem worse than yelling, and that is NAGGING :banghead I know it exasperates my dd to no end :(

[luvinmykidz]

:popcorn me too :O Difficult pregnancy and then PPD :hissyfit

[kiloyd]

:popcorn

I''ve also been meaning to post here about yelling. It is usually when I am tired or hungry. DS will do something not so good and I'll say "What are you doing?!!!" , when it is something stupid that he doesn't really know not to do. Or I tell him several times to go get changed for bed or get his shoes on so we can go. And after telling him two or three times I yell 'go get your shoes on!!".

I was wondering if there is some way I can remind myself to count to 5 or something before saying anything. I know one thing I need to do is REALLY work on the 5 steps. I have not been doing that.

I hope someone else here has some tips for us. We're all in this together.

[wombmate3]

:think

Ok, one good idea for us. Apologize! When I yell (which has been too much lately) I tell them how sorry I am for being mean and loud. Gabe sometimes tells me to 'use your nice voice mama' :laughtears

It's good for them to see that we need Grace just as they do, kwim?

I just get this image of these gentle mums out there who are so peaceful and gentle but firm, and in control of their negative emotions
Nice to know it's not just me...

:giggle

Uh, no! It's what I shoot for and maybe achieve 75% of the time, but when I am sick AND have my period??? Oh just forget about it. I yelled at Hannah last night to shut up because her never-ending following me around the house whining in a voice I cant even HEAR was making my head feel like it was about to explode. :shifty :blush

:grouphug

[kiloyd]

I have apologized before too.

[Nik999]

My 3 yo will say, "Mommy, stop yelling at me!" It breaks my heart. So I'll apologise too, and tell him I shouldn't have yelled because we try not to yell in our house. Then he'll say it's okay and I marvel at how forgiving he is. (I'm learning a lot from him :D)

[arwen_tiw]

I'm finding that the more my attitude towards DD changes (the less adversarial I'm feeling) the less I end up yelling naturally, without thinking about it. But that is only changing very slowly the more time I spend around people who encourage that attitude in me (this and other AP boards, my wonderful friend (childless) who is very gentle by nature and almost embarrases me with how good she is with my daughter. :blush Also being more together in my Christian life, doing more studying and praying and dwelling on my Father. :heart

My flashpoint is when I'm tired. I get so out of perspective and take every little normal toddler thing to heart - as if she's doing things on purpose to annoy me. :cry I'm trying to ask for help sooner and not struggle on getting resentful until I yell (and DD howls) and DH has to take her before she gets a slapped hand. :(

I'm struggling too, I'm tired a lot at the moment. :grouphug

[bliss]

I'd say I'd like to stop yelling, but my throat hurts. . . :O
I've found it's totally related to my blood sugar levels. And I learned how to parent from a woman who could turn "put your cup in the dishwasher" into a 30 minute expository speech. :rolleyes I have to remind myself to Just. Shut. Up. I learned, I think in "Parents Please Don't Step On Your Kids" to see if you can use one or two word sentances to get your point across. (Once they're older - I do this with the seven and twelve) "Cup." "Shoes off." "Nice to the cat." It helps quell the diatribe.

[Cindy]

And I learned how to parent from a woman who could turn "put your cup in the dishwasher" into a 30 minute expository speech.

Oh yes! My dad was that way!! He probably spanked me 3 times my whole childhood and used to jokingly say that my biggest fear was that he would talk me to death :giggle

I am afraid I have inherited the talent... :blush

[Marsha]

I'd say I'd like to stop yelling, but my throat hurts. . . :O
I've found it's totally related to my blood sugar levels. And I learned how to parent from a woman who could turn "put your cup in the dishwasher" into a 30 minute expository speech. :rolleyes I have to remind myself to Just. Shut. Up. I learned, I think in "Parents Please Don't Step On Your Kids" to see if you can use one or two word sentances to get your point across. (Once they're older - I do this with the seven and twelve) "Cup." "Shoes off." "Nice to the cat." It helps quell the diatribe.


Oh, I talk, talk, talk myself to death and frustrate myself. NO wonder she doesn't listen, and I get exhausted and yell. Also VERY related to my blood sugar. I fear I am pre diabetic or something. I am following a diabetic diet but still have some days when I don't eat at the right time or something and those are my bad days.
I keep praying for more of Jesus inside. That way what comes out won't be so ugly. Yk?

[hiddenhippie6]

I know for myself, just like my children I need to make sure that I am not tired or hungry. I just can not be nice if I need one of those things :blush We as mothers seem to remember that for our kids,but forget about ourselves. At least I do. I am so busy making sure everyone else has enough to eat or gets enough sleep I kind of forget about my self.