boys being boys and setting boundries for my sanity

[Robersonlass]

My 2 boys are non-stop go, go, go all day. What I am having a hard time with is when things get out of hand every 5 minutes and they hit , tease or the noise level is really loud. Constant "MOM" he hit me, he took my toy and on and on..... I homeschool and when things are structured for them it goes well, it is the free play time they run into trouble. They seem to get so wound up they do not listen to me. I know they need an outlet for their energy but inside that is a challenge. Sugesstions to help things go more smoothly?

[Close2MyHeart]

:popcorn

My boys aren't far in age from yours and I deal w/ the same things!! DS1 is 4.5 and DS2 is 3.5.. there is constant "He hit me" "he took my toy" "I want him to leave me alone" or even "He won't play with me!!" ugh! It gets SO OLD!!!

Not sure what to do about it either. It seems the days we do projects & I give them lots of chores theya re better, but that takes a lot more energy from me, which is something I do not have at the moment. :rolleyes

[mommylori]

I have boys your childrens ages and another also that is 1.5. whne they get way out of control I send thewm outside.lol Even in the cold, I have coats gloves snow boots and everything. I also redirect them. When hitting and argueing becomes a issue, I sit them all 3, the little one really gets init too, on the sofa and pull up a chair in front of them and wait till the whole things calms down, then I let them play. I have realized I have a house of boys, and it is going to be loud, things are going things are going to get broke and there is going to be fights, and it will probley be this way for a long time. I was the only girl in my family, and I had 2 brothers.lol My mom did spank it didn't end it, they are stil that way.
So I set my boundries, that nothing gets broke and no fighting, but knowing it is going to happen helps.lol I also will send one to the comfort corner which is a popup tent till they calm down and hold the other one, and then switch kids. Now rastling is a completely diffrent manner I don't freak over that. I also make sure I have lots of books on snakes, turtles, lizards, frogs and bugs around and let them play with thoughs. And I try to set up things for them to play, like yesterday while I cooked they played like they where the crocodile hunter in the national zoo.lol Another good one is I have them look around the windows for bugs, they found 2 ladybugs yesterday! But seriously if my kids get real bad they go outside, my backyard is not winning any contest, it is littered with bikes and toys I have 2 swingsets and a trampaline. There are holes where the kids decided to shovel and sticks in a pile that is supposed to be a t-pee, and I had a rockgarden but it was tore apart on the quest for bugs, but it keeps my boys busy for hours.lol And in the winter 5 min seems to do the same amount of good at killing energy as 1 hour in the summer.lol
But even through all the squables I do realize my boys are very very close, if someone picks on one of my kids they have to run from 3, if one is crying the other 2 are right there to ckeck on him, they really do love eachother and take care of eachother, they are best friends, so that helps also.
Lori

[Close2MyHeart]

Lori,

Outside is a good idea :) However, I dont' let the kids go out by themselves yet, so all 4 of us would have to bundle up for 5 minutes of play time. LOL!! On really rough days, we do tho... :)

[Robersonlass]

I would love to send the boys out, they argue and complain it is too cold :0( Maybe I should just say for 10 minutes and hope they do longer. It is about 20 degrees right now, gonna have to bundle them up.

[Carrie in PA]

Boys are fun, aren't they??? :lol I have 4 and most of the time I can deal with the noise and activity...but sometimes I just don't get it!!!! :rolleyes And mine are older....so don't expect it to change any time soon! :hugheart

Seriously, though, they do need some amount of structured activity and lots of lenience in letting them be boys....wrestling, running, jumping, etc. Outside is a great option when you can do it. I have the blessing of having property and a private yard they can explore. When that is not an option, or just as an alternative, I will announce that it is time to sit and listen to a story and drink hot chocolate or something like that. That often works. Or sometimes I give them jobs to do and make it sound fun....see who can pick up the toys quickest or who can find the most cups all through the house and bring them to the kitchen. The older ones don't find it all that fun (13 and 10), but they can settle more quickly than the younger ones anyway! Sometimes they all just need more attention from me, which isn't always easy, but even a few minutes playing a game or reading or doing a craft can help change the tone for a little while.

So just try a variety of distractions, scene and activity changes....and lots of prayer for patience! Be careful though cause some of my hardest days have been when I've asked for patience...the Lord certainly allows opportunities to try it! :giggle

I probably haven't offered you much help, but I can definitely offer you an understanding shoulder to cry on when you need it! :hug

[mommylori]

I bundle everyone up sent them out one by one at the back door.lol It works, but I have a huge fenced in backyard, if it wasn't for the fact I live in a super quiet neighborhood with a fenced in backyard I may feel diffrent about it.
Lori

[Katherine]

We have the same issues. Not having property or a good situation for extensive outside play has prompted me to make more allowances to meet their energy requirements inside. I do try to take them out every day, when possible, but I don't let mine go outside by themselves (4 and 2yo), and probably won't for a long time, and we don't have much of a yard anyway (small and steep :/ ). I do, however, move the cars out of the garage and let them ride bikes/trikes in there--especially on really cold days when the wind is unbearable, or right now b/c I have a newborn I don't want to take out in the cold. I also let them jump on *their own* beds, which are mattresses and box springs on the floor. I purposefully keep their room set up so they can climb to the top of their plastic toy chest and jump off of it onto the beds in the safest way possible. They use the recliner like a merry-go-round and they race through the house pushing their Tonka trucks. I turned the dining room into a play room. We have one of those big plastic forts with a slide in there. They eat at a small kids' table and chairs in a corner of the kitchen. I pull a bigger chair up to it. (dh works during regular mealtimes, so we can't eat dinner "as a family" anyway... I am, however, looking for an adult version of folding chairs/table that we can set up and take down easily for meals... for those rare occasions when we do all eat at home together).

When I am successful at providing structure for them, we do better. When I'm not (like lately :blush) it can be pretty tough. I am learning that separate play time is a good thing, that giving them too many choices often cause more trouble than not... that limiting their toys helps, and that there are a few particular toys which are better put away b/c they cannot seem to find ANY way to peacefully coexist in their presence. :giggle

And, after all that effort... it's still a problem sometimes. :banghead AND little brother will be getting into the action before this year is over. :jawdrop :doh :lol