Are some kids just not very cuddly?

[lavender mom]

This question was posed on another board that I visit and I was just curious how a different group of women might answer the question. :-) I know how *my* kids are, but I've only got two of them and figure that's not quiet enough experience to judge. ;)

Do you think there is anything we do as parents to make kids more or less "cuddly" or is it just a personality trait?

[Amber]

My ds is probably in the middle on the wanting to cuddle scale. There are times when he wants a quick snuggle then he is back to being busy. He isn't one to sit on the sofa and snuggle with me. Maybe that will change as time goes on, he is 15mo now, and it seems like he is just too busy to cuddle.

[Sara]

I've had two girls on opposite ends, so I do think it is largely determined by personality. However, I definitely think there are things that might make a child less cuddly. Like being Ezzo'ed, just as one example.

[Radosny Matka]

My first was not very cuddly until about 18 months. My baby is super cuddly. :hearts

[Irene]

DD is not cuddly, ds is :)

[joyfulmomsie]

My oldest was and is not 'cuddly', although she does not shun physical affection. It's just that it's always been a quick hug before she ran off to do something else (except when upset or sick). She was Ezzo'd and disciplined punitively.

My middle child is more cuddly. I breastfed her for 4 months, used a sling, began co-sleeping around a year old when I finally realized that Ezzo wasn't going to work w/her, and just started GBD w/her in the past few months.

The youngest is the most cuddly child I've ever met, and he is the one who has been co-slept, slinged, nursed on demand, and gently disciplined from the beginning (he's 17 months now).
Coincidence? ;)

[TheSweetLife]

Dd is not cuddly, unless she is going to sleep. She is only 16m too so maybe that has something to do with it but she has always seemed to want her own space. She was breastfed until 10m; used sling, slept right next to our bed, no CIO so I think its just her personality. She is pretty independent.

[milkmommy]

I think the majority is personality but yes I think to some degree we could influence it. Kids pushed away even those who are naturally cuddly can become dettached and less likely to accept being help cuddled latter, they're also less likely to trust. Just like a more naturally "independent" can find cuddling a comfort even aiding there independancy.. I'll use my own DD both DH nad I are quite introverted we don't like a lot of touch, dd has lots of this n her personality its why some things we do such as a quiet time work so well for us because she NEEDS that time (heck she kicks me out if I try to enter during her time :giggle) She could be on her own and on the go 24/7 if we let her, but we still nurse I wore her a lot she cosleept these all have done there part to help reconnect to remind is we need to take timeouts from a busy world and just love oneanother.

Deanna

[purplerose]

I think it can be both personality and parenting styles. My DD is very cuddly, DS1 can be (it depends on his mood) and my baby is very cuddly. But he's only 3wks, so not sure if that counts yet!!! All my kids were co-slept, bf babies. So who knows?! :scratch