wow, im speechless

[BeckaBlue]

i'm on IM with a person i haven't talked to in some time. shes angry that her 14yo is refusing a kidney reflux test and the dr won't do it because she's refusing (apparently the 14yo doesn't want the nurse to see her privates).

I'm just :eek at some of the things she's saying about her. that 'she needs to get her *butt* a job and move out', that since she 'has no say what the *bleep* do i keep her for?' and it's a waste of her money to keep her dd.

i'm just :eek :sick :mad :td :hissyfit :banghead and so much more, in shock

I'm really trying to gbd *her* but boy is that bein tough when i'm just speechless!!!

[MarynMunchkins]

:wow How incredibly sad...

:cry

[greenemama]

:cry that's awful.

[gamomof2]

:eek :cry

[katiekind]

Oh dear. That makes me really sad. :sick

:pray

God grant them compassion and patience with each other.

[APMamaX4]

So instead of try to understand her dd and put her at ease, her mom is calling her a good-for-nothing child who should just get out??? :sad2

Have you sugg. to her mom that she try to be an ally w/her dd, instead of the enemy? Maybe if she would sit down and TALK to her dd, she could put her at ease.

I hate to even imply this.... but has the girl been abused, sexually? I guess I just find it odd that she would be refusing some test for some medical condition all b/c she doesn't want the nurse to see her private area? That seems...odd, to me. I know people can be more "prude" than others, but in that kind of setting (dr's, nurses) to still just all out refuse over that? Odd, IMO. Are you sure she hasn't been abused? And the attitude her mom is taking towards her doesn't make my suspicion any less. So sad for the girl :(

Oh, have you tried talking to the 14 y/o? Maybe you could put her at ease, if her mom can't be bothered to try?

[Wonder Woman]

:eek :bheart

[BeckaBlue]

by the time we finished, she had calmed down a bit, still upset, but being more understanding

according to her she did sit down to talk to her, kindly, and apparently others did too

I really don't know them that well, we met on a special needs message board and just IM occassionaly. the thought entered my mind, but i do think it's a different issue, but i really can't know :bheart

[ellies mom]

I hate to even imply this.... but has the girl been abused, sexually? I guess I just find it odd that she would be refusing some test for some medical condition all b/c she doesn't want the nurse to see her private area? That seems...odd, to me. I know people can be more "prude" than others, but in that kind of setting (dr's, nurses) to still just all out refuse over that? Odd, IMO. Are you sure she hasn't been abused? And the attitude her mom is taking towards her doesn't make my suspicion any less. So sad for the girl :(


Thank you, that was the first thing that entered my mind. What is going on with this girl to make her that uncomfortable? That should have been a serious red flag in that mom's mind rather than a diatribe about kicking her out.

[zak]

I've been that way my whole life and was never sexually abused. I HATE the thought of ANYONE seeing me naked - I even wore stuff under my hospital gown when I had surgeries as a child. Even child birth was VERY awkward for me... I hated that part - people say you won't care... I cared!

I'm so sad for her. I had a kidney disease at 15 years old... although no one ever needed to see my 'privates'... I did have to have a kidney biopsy... it was terrible.

:pray for that girl... I've been there myself!

[CelticJourney]

I hated that part - people say you won't care... I cared!

Same here - I just filed it away as 'one of the things you do for your children' and 'pushed' on.

[Irene]

yeah me too, never abused, horrified at any sort of doctors, nurses etc looking at me :eek

[CelticJourney]

The first and only time I have been 'examined' by a male doctor was 20 hours into labor and at the request of my midwife.

[zak]

I hear ya... I never had a male OB/doc... it is really something I never hope to encounter.

Sorry for you about that :(