domesticzookeeper
05-21-2005, 11:22 PM
Okay, I've mentioned in other posts how I'm trying to be more GBD with my younger siblings. My "little" brother (who is, in fact, quite larger than me :rolleyes) is not really an issue, the kid's so easygoing and sweet that we never even argue :shrug But, my little sister (11 yo) is the most intense person I have ever dealt with :eek She and I get into more verbal tiffs than I would like... :blush
Anyway, something my mom has always done and has bugged me to no end, is that she consistantly demands apologies :mad. She won't even allow some breathing room in the conversation (or lecture) to let the other person contemplate, just tells us to apologize. Needless to say, that created a lot of defensiveness among myself and my siblings as no one likes an apology to be extracted from them :banghead. Not to mention you don't even feel sincere about it...
Stil, I found myself doing that very same thing when Stephen and Hannah got into yet another disagreement *where's the pulling-my-hair-out emoticon?*. But I've been making a conscious effort to avoid doing that and letting them apologize and ask forgiveness of their own accord.
And you know what? They do it on their own just fine! :eek
Yesterday an argument quickly escalated to the point of name-calling and door slamming, and I made myself stay out of the whole affair (while listening from my room). They had seperated themselves to cool down, and I wanted to see where it would go from there. It was nearly 10 minutes later when Hannah came out of her room, apologized to her brother for calling him names, and asked him to forgive her. He forgave her, and then apologized himself. :tu
So proud :mrgreen
Anyway, something my mom has always done and has bugged me to no end, is that she consistantly demands apologies :mad. She won't even allow some breathing room in the conversation (or lecture) to let the other person contemplate, just tells us to apologize. Needless to say, that created a lot of defensiveness among myself and my siblings as no one likes an apology to be extracted from them :banghead. Not to mention you don't even feel sincere about it...
Stil, I found myself doing that very same thing when Stephen and Hannah got into yet another disagreement *where's the pulling-my-hair-out emoticon?*. But I've been making a conscious effort to avoid doing that and letting them apologize and ask forgiveness of their own accord.
And you know what? They do it on their own just fine! :eek
Yesterday an argument quickly escalated to the point of name-calling and door slamming, and I made myself stay out of the whole affair (while listening from my room). They had seperated themselves to cool down, and I wanted to see where it would go from there. It was nearly 10 minutes later when Hannah came out of her room, apologized to her brother for calling him names, and asked him to forgive her. He forgave her, and then apologized himself. :tu
So proud :mrgreen