doing stuff for them, kinda a spinoff

[iplsmama]

Okay, the other thread made me think of this. I practice get off your butt parenting and at this stage it seems I am always helping my kids, 5 1/2, 3 1/2, do things especially cleaning up. Now my mom, who is rather punitive and very impatient, was over when I asked the kids to pick up stuff and she noted that they seem to always dawdle around waiting for me to help them. Like with the 5 steps, we are always on step 3. When do they do this stuff alone and can I do anything to encourage us not getting to step 3? I work under the assumption that they will do so as they get older, am I naive?? TIA

[Danette]

It does get better as they get older... my boys are getting much better at picking up without much help and they are 8 and 6 1/2... my 4 year old daughter still needs a lot of help to pick up her room and toys. I try and make it a game or set goals for her like "You pick up the dolls and I'll pick up the clothes" or "I will pick up five things and I want you to pick up 5 things too and then we'll see how the room looks." Setting a timer is great motivation too.

[ArmsOfLove]

It does get better as they get older. At the same time, they will push to the boundary you have set for them. When my children are pushing more than I'm comfortble with I up the ante--Step 1 followed immediately by Step 4, or Step 1 WHILE I'm helping them ;) With my 5yo I will direct from a distance as "help"--Okay, now go pick up . . . "

hth