mrsramjet
04-17-2005, 05:42 AM
hi there,
just looking for some ideas / scripts / strategies to use with my 4yr old boy.
he is an intense person and reacts in a big way to nearly everything.
now, when i approach him for just about anything - good or not so good - he runs away from me.
sometimes i manage to move towards him before i broach whatever it is and can get a hand on to him before he manages it. then we have to sit with him on my lap freaking out until he calms down to hear whatever it is....
he also is doing it to be 'funny' when i need him for something.
particularly if he has just hurt or been mean to his little brother or broken something belonging to his older sister.
i am feeling infuriated at the time that my words seem to mean nothing to him. to 'make' them mean something seems to involve me getting into a game of chasey. this isn't always ideal. my dh witnessed me doing this and was so disdainful of the gentle process in that instance. he sent him to his room and banned him from computer time that night. (sigh). dh has never spanked but he is very much into big voices (never actually yells though..... how do men manage that??) and time outs (punitive) etc.
the other option i follow is to 'not engage' in the chase, but that leaves me with "what now?" i'm here and he's over the other side of the yard.
any one????
just looking for some ideas / scripts / strategies to use with my 4yr old boy.
he is an intense person and reacts in a big way to nearly everything.
now, when i approach him for just about anything - good or not so good - he runs away from me.
sometimes i manage to move towards him before i broach whatever it is and can get a hand on to him before he manages it. then we have to sit with him on my lap freaking out until he calms down to hear whatever it is....
he also is doing it to be 'funny' when i need him for something.
particularly if he has just hurt or been mean to his little brother or broken something belonging to his older sister.
i am feeling infuriated at the time that my words seem to mean nothing to him. to 'make' them mean something seems to involve me getting into a game of chasey. this isn't always ideal. my dh witnessed me doing this and was so disdainful of the gentle process in that instance. he sent him to his room and banned him from computer time that night. (sigh). dh has never spanked but he is very much into big voices (never actually yells though..... how do men manage that??) and time outs (punitive) etc.
the other option i follow is to 'not engage' in the chase, but that leaves me with "what now?" i'm here and he's over the other side of the yard.
any one????