Sad but encouraging...Parent going on trial for whipping with belt

[4blessings]

Here's an article I just came across. A man in a town near me is going on trial for whipping his 13 y/o son with a belt. I am sad for the boy but so encouraged that DCFS did something about it. This kind of thing is SO commonplace in this part of the country! I am truly shocked that a parent has actually been charged with abuse for something like this. Really, this is HUGE! Most parents here don't consider spanking with a belt abuse, but feel it's their parental right and responsibility. My neighbor (who is otherwise a really good, caring mom) freely admits to "spanking" her children with a belt. I'm sure she leaves marks, too. Is it possible to hit a child on bare skin with a belt and not leave a mark?


http://www.examiner-enterprise.com/articles/2005/04/09/news/4779.txt

[ArmsOfLove]

that poor boy :( I'll be curious to see if anything comes of this.

[Peepsqueak]

A child that age is capable of fighting back. It seems to me if spanking is so effective, you had plenty of time to spank some sense into before the age of 13. Just goes to show doing things the same old way is no good. Time for changes of some traditions.

[Reva]

:cry Poor boy. :( I'm glad something is being done about it.

[Knitted_in_the_wom]

A child that age is capable of fighting back.

I'm not sure what you mean by this comment?

I can assure you as a survivor of child abuse (including being beaten with a belt or wooden paddle), that a 13 year old who has been treated in this way for years is NOT capable of fighting back. The child is too darned scared. You know you are too young to survive on your own, so you submit to the treatment. I was 16 before "fought for myself." And I was stark terrified--even with my high school principal and guidance counselor at my sides. My brother was 16 when he left home for college--he never fought back. Actually, after a brief period of being mad as he** with our parents, he went begging back to them. Why? Because they messed him up so baddly that he can't form decent relationships, so to get the love that every person needs he has to have a relationship with them on their terms--which means agreeing that they did not abuse us.

Jenn

[cheri]

I'll be interested in how this case ends. I've found that many people around here believe that "whooping" with a belt is acceptable in certain circumstances. And some still use switches.

[Hermana Linda]

I can assure you ...that a 13 year old who has been treated in this way for years is NOT capable of fighting back.

I guess it's a bit like the sermon illustration I have heard about the training of an elephant. They chain his leg when he is young and by the time he is grown up, he can be confined by tying a bit of string around his leg because he has no idea that he can get away. So, I can totally see how it would never occur to them to fight back. :(