how to deal with banning foods

[BeckaBlue]

my ds has multiple food allergies so there's certain foods we don't allow in the house anymore (cheese crackers, popcorn, etc...) because the girls would leave crumbs laying around or what have you.

today dd1 comes and asks for popcorn, i reminded her that we can't have it here anymore, but she can have some potato chips instead. she started with her whine "but mooom, i waaannt it!!!' i remind her it's not safe for the baby. she goes again, i remind her that they were spilling it too much and refusing to pick up. she goes in with 'i promise i won't again!' and i just break down with 'but abbey will'

i HATE that i blamed it on abbey. she WOULD spill it, but so would kenzie (she has good intentions but often has a difficult time following through) and regardless i wouldnt want popcorn in here anymore.

so im curious wwyd if a child keeps pressing for something not allowed after redirecting? what do you say? In ways i hate that shes put into this position of big change (weve changed a lotr of foods here and she doesnt like them) but i also hafta think for the safety of others, something, that at 5, i expect her to respect, but i also realize she may not totally understand of the severity

[Wonder Woman]

Do she and Abby share a room? Is it a space that your ds isn't allowed in?
If so, have you thought about microwave popcorn allowed only in that room, with hands washed, shirt changed if necessary, and face washed/teeth brushed?

I know it would be a pain for you, but it might help Kenzie with the transition.

My best friend has a 3 yo, and bf usually packs snacks with peanuts/chocolate in them, both of which I am anaphylactic allergic to. The 3yo knows not to touch me or ds if we are out and she has a snack, unles she has washed her hands and face first. If she is at my house, I have on spot on my hardwood floor where she is allowed to sit and eat her snack, then we do the cleanup routine.

Just something to think about - I wish you the best! :cookie :hkiss :cookie Ahhh...virtual chocolate....the onky kind I get anymore!

[ArmsOfLove]

Well, I'm the mom and I don't have to justify my choices :) I offer a reason, but I also won't engage in debate. "Asked and answered" is what I resort to saying if they try to persuade me with whines. At the same time, I am open to listening to one well reasoned argument that provides information I didn't have already or offers an alternative solution to the stated problem.

So, what you described would not be okay. But I might entertain, "What if I ate it outside on the back patio and swept up afterwards?" I might still say no, or I might say yes, or I might say that's a good idea--not today but I will get some and another time we can do that, etc.

[Quietspirit]

My 5 year old has anaphylactic food allergies (fatal reaction) to milk, eggs, peanuts and nuts. My other children do not have those allergies. But, the entire family eats a "safe" diet. My explanation was similar to how Crystal answered above.

"Those foods are not safe for ________ so we are not going to be eating them as a family. You can have those foods at someone else's house or when we go out to eat."